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Soul Seeker -- A Novel of Lasniniar: A Review

2012-01-14T09:48:00.000+08:00

This book is a gift to humanity (after Twilight has corrupted our generation beyond repair *sigh*)

I mean, seriously. I was in euphoric state hours after I finished this book, dancing madly to Move Like Jagger.

It took me almost a full week to finish (because I’ve started working already) but every sitting was pure bliss. The rare thing is that the chapters were not written as cliffhanger (a trademark of Dan Brown’s books) but the story paced at reasonable speed so the readers will be content to put this down to...well...live like a normal person again but the story would still be in the back of your mind.

I couldn’t help but notice that the book has many striking similarities with The Lord of the Rings trilogy (It’s not surprising really, considering the author quoted J.R.R. Tolkien as one of her major influences). For instance, my oh my, the characters...
Iaron = Legolas
Barlo = Gimli (the dwarf, loyal best friend of Iaron)
Lysandir = Gandalf (one of the Learned Ones. The power to manipulate elements possessed by them was a nice touch)
Saviadro = Sauron (Although I personally more terrified of Sauron)
The Forsworn Ones = The Nazgul(s)

Okay! I have to stop, or else I risked of exposing spoilers to (I’m sure by now) the enthusiastic reader J

Usually, having similarities with legendary books such as The Lord of the Rings is a major no-no but I feel like my knowledge of the series help me enjoying this book better. It helped me imagining the characters and the settings more vividly.

But I swear, if I come across even a Hobbit in this book, I would send an angry mail to the author. Ha-ha!

Nevertheless, if you want to write a book like this, you can’t help but sort of tied to the obvious personalities of the elegant elves, the grumpy dwarves and so on. So yeah, I’m not trying to pan the author here, I’m just giving heads up to the valuable readers that sometimes similarities are necessary and unavoidable.

My favourite characters? Well, of course Iaron is worth swooning about but I really like Linwyn. She was a bad-ass, butt-kicking warrior! Same goes with the cute, bad-ass Sinstari, the wild cat (oh, I always have a soft spot for cats!)

Silvaranwyn surprised me with her seems-to-be dull exterior. She was for me, the most dynamic character in the story. I had a good laugh at some points too, thanks to Barlo.

Numarin sounded like a spoilt brat to be honest. I expect more from a Learned One than dialogues like:

“I hate you!” Numarin shrieked. “First you are the darling of the elves and now this. Everywhere I go, all I hear about is you!”

Hmm...forget that. That’s just tinie-tiny compares to the awesomeness of the whole book.

Oh ya, I found Iaron bedding all the three wild elves princesses at the same time frame as a little disturbing, more so, when he had no actual affection towards them.

No! I’m not jealous!

I mean really, I know the setting supposed to be ancient but nah...it still sounds disturbing.

Finally, the battle and fighting scenes, there were just EPIC.

For example:

He ducked her first blow. The sword whistled through the air where his head had been a moment before. Linwyn knew she had to be quick. She could hear others running to join their tribe-mate. She threw herself at him in a wild fury, but he managed to bring up his spear to block each of her attacks.

The others were getting closer.

Linwyn abruptly switched her strategy. She used a double-feint to confuse her opponent. He didn’t fall for the first feint, but he was fooled by the second. As he brought his spear up to block the blow he thought was coming, Linwyn switched the angle of her sword at the last possible moment...

The ending was not perfect, but a satisfying one. The last few chapters got my heart pounding so fast!

What else...hmm...I wish I could write longer but face it, when a book is this good, you can hardly find anything wrong with it, what more you can write about except words cannot describe how wonderful this book is.

To wrap it up, I may have to switch my most favourite genre from Young Adult to Fantasy novel solely after reading this book.

Self Discovery

2011-12-16T16:26:00.001+08:00

Until yesterday, I thought I was an anime fan. But then, I took an arrow in the knee.

Ok, not funny anymore!

Actually, there are only 3 anime that I truly enjoyed in my entire existence.

1. Fate/stay night

I still don't understand why the title is stylized like that but yeah pretty much all the actions happened at night because the whole Holy Grail, Servants and Masters thingy must be hidden from the general public. Saber, the main female character is a warrior and a king in her past life (like being a warrior is not hot enough!). Her complex relationship with the main male character, Shiro is sort of like Bella + Edward story but thousand times better and importantly, in a good way. But beware of the ending, consistent with the overall darker tone of this story, the epilogue left me heartbroken but undeniably, it was the perfect ending, can't argue with that.

2. The Law of Ueki

Surprisingly, the backbone of the story resembles Pokemon but the similarities stop there. I still remember watching the whole series with my nephews and nieces, we cheered for Ueki and his team together :) To say that the series is funny is an understatement. It is witty, creative (you will never guess what the powers of the characters would be, or how the battle would turn out). This is simply one of those rare anime that seems too childish for me but turned out to be very inspirational and 'clean' to be watched together with your younger relatives.

3. Black Butler/Kuroshitsuji

Bite me, but I do have a maaaaaaaajor crush on Sebastian. Oh wait, he's a demon? But he can cook and he fights with silverware. Can we just forget that he is...ermmm...a demon? I always wondering, wouldn't it be better if Ciel is not a boy but is a 18 years old girl. That would save me some sanity. Honestly, somehow by watching this series, being a gay pedophile doesn't seem like a distant idea.

Anyway, back to the series, I can hardly believe my luck, stumbled across this anime. 19th century London setting? Check! Epic wardrobe collection? Check! Sexy British accent? Check! Paranormal twist? Check! Flawed, revengeful yet cute Ciel? Check!

In short, it's hard not to be a fangirl when you constantly having nosebleed throughout the series. Beware of Grell Sutcliff, even he certainly not going to cause you a nosebleed, you'll adore him...or her? Nevermind!

This is also the first series that unleash the manga reader in me. Honestly, how do I know you have to read a manga page from right to left. And I started drinking the exotic Earl Grey tea because of the series! Now, it's my favorite flavour!

I'm in a quest to elongate this list. Suggestions welcomed! I tried Darker than Black, Colorcloud Princess, Hayate the Combat Butler, Angel Beats. None works~

Hipsterism

2011-12-14T20:11:00.000+08:00

Oh yes. I've been missing too long from blogging world. It feels like...

...when I logged into my Blogger account just now.

I'm a victim to the newly trending style...COLOUR BLOCKING. No more prints! Just bold colours contrasting with each other.

But then I browsed through my old photos (not really old in the sense that they're pictures when I was in KMB).

Nevermind, I feel very old already.

And then I realized I'd been doing colour blocking at that point of time already!

I'm a hipster

21st Century Problem

2011-08-17T13:32:00.000+08:00

Cost AUD$16 to change a new battery for my watch

Post that watch to my niece

Bought a new Casio watch for AUD$25 (technically, a second-hand one)

LIKE A BOSS

Loathing

2011-07-22T14:58:00.000+08:00

My bestie has gone to Melbourne...and it left a big hole in my heart. What the...

No, I'm not trying to be poetic, I realized I suck at literature since I was in Form 2, art and science are somehow two very diverging pathways, even I tried to hold on to both, I simply had to give up one of them.

With she's gone, somehow I can think clearer about how things stood around me, Yes, I was the only one from my batch in KMB who studies in Adelaide. Everytime my friends ask about KMB, I'll reply them as if I was a grandma, telling stories to her grandchildren. Seems like those moments in KMB were the moments of a golden era I once had. No one said it was easy, in fact, I scored lousy marks back then compared to now, but I was happier, I know I was.

I used to tell my IRP group leader that I require only a small space of this whole world to live my life. He-who-must-not-be-named joked 'that's why you content having a roomate around', like a boss. I just laughed, he was in fact 'The Boss'. Haters will hate :)

As a kid, having a small cottage by the river with a field full with farm animals, and a swing hanging from a maple tree in my backyard was how I imagine myself living after I become an adult. An adult with a family of course. But life is more complicated than that. After all, what are the purposes of Allah sending me here. We all know the answers. Not to curl up in my cozy swing, reading a good book while sipping a cup of cappuccino.

But yeah, it feels like I'm currently living my childhood dream. I thought, taking care of a lucky bamboo plant and a couple of guinea pigs (they are both males though) will make me feel more normal? Like, in the midst of pracs and assignments, I can still take care of living things?

Socially retarded. That's 'normal' I thought I was heading to. I was downright awkward, I always knew it but somehow life made it easier for me before. I have class teachers, subject teachers, classmates, roomates, wingmates, blockmates, that were what they were for at least a year. Plenty of time to mend bonds. But uni is not like that, especially when you are an international student who think hanging out with Malays is not cool anymore (by what I mean cool is 'hello~ you are in OZ, you'd be wasting the opportunity of the lifetime if you still want to stick with the same bunch of people').

In uni, the lecturers hardly notice you, the coursemates do not necessarily be in the same classes as yours even they are enrolled in the same subjects as yours. It's true, I have 5-6 friends (not surprisingly, Asians) who I can do my homework and revision together with and sit in the lecture theater with, but mostly we talk about...well...how uni's been treating us, the due dates, the pre-reading, the lab worksheets. I tried to talk about their families, their original countries, their foods but I don't know, as far as I know, the conversations can only lasted five minutes, then I'd be running out things to say, so did she or he. People say when you're coming from a very different background, you'll have more things to say. I wonder why that does not apply to me.

Now, it's only hours from the new semester and days from Ramadhan. And I'm freaking nervous. I know this coming semester and Ramadhan should be better than the last time but I'm not ready, I know I'm not. Holiday has been treating me well actually, at last I could find times to read novels, bake and search for a casual or part time job which well, made me realize than I need to study harder, searching for jobs is suck! I seriously want job to find me instead because I loathe the resume, the CV and the cover letter. Maybe that's just my ego.

Conundrums

2011-07-16T12:50:00.001+08:00

What is this feeling that's boiling inside of me...

I like today's weather very much, bright albeit a bit chilly...nevermind, I love this small town very much. My holiday in NSW (literally), was enjoyable but not entirely pleasant. The people, the price, the transport... What I can say is Sydney is one hostile, crowded and an expensive city, definitely not senior citizen-friendly. Newie? Wow, I'm glad that I wasn't threw at this place, what a sandy, chilly and windy town, not to my liking. Port Stephen? Haha, sometimes it felt like a ghost town. I kinda like Kiama, very relaxing with warm people. Wollongong? Hmm...they have Aldi, how can Adelaide can't have one?! Oh yeah, along the trip, I realized that I've regard Adelaide as my home, even it's lacking in well, Aldi, EasyWay, 7 Eleven and Lord of the Fries. The feeling of coming home was unmistakable.

Oh yeah, results were already out. Alhamdulillah, my record is still clean. I have a mission you see. I heard one of the sisters here who currently pursuing for Phd is sponsored by Uni after she successfully maintained HD and D grades throughout her undergrad study. I'm plain afraid, I don't think I want to work after I completed my degree or with Allah's will, my Honors (ameen). I want to go further and I feel that if I can secure that Uni scholarship, then Felda has no reasons to stop me even that means I'll be working with them years later. It's not like I'm...urmm..using their money anymore right?

*Sigh* Uncertainties...uncertainties... First, Biomed is not a child's play, getting all to way to Phd...well...means I have to thrash my brain and body to the limits. Second, Felda has the control over what is written in the contract. Third, I'm just half the way through my degree and I little slip (a credit or lower) means I may not be qualified anymore.

You see, some of my housemates can afford to work part time right now and considering I'm not saving as much as I want, I should consider working part time as well. But last semester, I was technically inches from not submitting my works on their due dates. Yeah, sometimes I was lazy and I did procrastinate but minus all that, I'm still not sure if I can make it through without letting my grades hovering on the edge.

I know, I know...I sounded like a grade-freak and yeah, grades do not mean everything but... I don't know, I guess I just want to write down what I feel right now. I feel like adopting a cat/kitten and yeah, I have guinea pigs in my room, what a smart idea. I desperately want to watch Harry Potter and The Deathly Hallows Part 2. It seems like wherever I go, people keep talking about it. Arghhh~ Should I spend $8 for it?! When I really should be spending that for...err...foods? I even feel like I want to get pregnant. No, not like that! The feeling when I have something or you know, someone growing inside you. OMG, I may need a professional help. Bye~

The Boycott List

2011-07-01T18:15:00.000+08:00

From http://mediatakrasmi.blogspot.com/2011/05/boycott-list.html

LOL, I thought I remembered every brand that I should boycott by heart...Nope. The bold names are those products which I just found out that need to be boycotted. Hopefully, I will remember those.

why r u doing this? for muslims, this is deeply related to our faith (iman) and our brotherhood connection with our brothers-sisters @ Palestine. and for all those concerned citizens, this is all about humanity.
start small stay dedicated. maybe u can start with 3 boycotted brands that u use to buy for 3 months period. and the next 3 months, u add 3 more addition to ur pesonal boycott list.
palestine issue also needs 'adjuvant therapy' besides boycott - doa/prayer, infaq/charity, invite others to join as well :)

~THE LIST~

a) restaurant /cafes - do avoid these places :

TGI fridays (by Heinz company)
famous amos (by Kellog company)
mcD
starbucks
burger king
pizza hut (by Yum! Brands)
KFC (by Yum! Brands)
A&W (by Yum! Brands)
domino's pizza

b) equipments / gadgets - u're buying new mobile phones/laptops. try to avoid these:

nokia
motorola
intel

c) food & drinks - u're at the department store, avoid putting these into ur trolley :

nestea tea (by nestle)
pickwick tea (by sara lee)
milo (by nestle)
nescafe (by nestle)
coffee-mate (by nestle)
nesquik (by nestle)
sunkist (by dr pepper snaple group)
carte noir coffee (by kraft)
jacobs coffee (by kraft)
maxwell house coffee (by kraft)

soft drinks :

fanta (by pepsico)
cocacola (by pepsico)
gatorade (by pepsico)
mirinda (by pepsico)
sprite (by pepsico)
mountain dew (by pepsico)
adrenaline rush (by pepsico)
7up soft (by pepsico & dr pepper snaple group)
dr pepper (by dr pepper snaple group)
schweppes (by dr pepper snaple group)
a&w (by dr pepper snaple group)
revive (pepsi malaysia)
f&n (f&n coca cola malaysia)
100 plus (f&n coca cola malaysia)
sprite (f&n coca cola malaysia)

mineral/drinking water :

aquafina (by pepsico)
bonaqua (by pepsico)
aqua minerale (by pepsico)
rodniki rossii (by pepsico)
vittel (by nestle)
perrier (by nestle)
pure life (by nestle)
evian (by danone)
aquarius (f&n coca cola malaysia)

juice :

ya (by pepsico)
tonus (by pepsico)
fruktoviy sad (by pepsico)
tropicana (by pepsico)
frustyle (by pepsico)
100% gold (by pepsico)
seasons (f&n coca cola malaysia)
fruit tree (f&n coca cola malaysia)
sunkist (f&n coca cola malaysia)

chips :

cheetos (by pepsico)
lay's (by pepsico)
khrus team (by pepsico)
twisties (by kraft)
estrella (by kraft)
cheezels (by kraft)
lurve (by kraft)
chipster (by kraft)
chacos (by kraft)

bicuits & crackers:

oreo (by kraft)
nabisco (by kraft)
jacob's (by kraft)
chips ahoy! (by kraft)
biskut tiger (by kraft)
chipsmore (by kraft)

cereals :

kellogg cornflakes etc (by kellogg)
honey stars, koko krunch etc (by nestle)

ice cream :

maxibon (by nestle)
48 kopeek (by nestle)
mega (by nestle)
extreme (by nestle)
bon pari (by nestle)
moevenpick (by nestle)
mat kool (by nestle malaysia)
magnolia (f&n coca cola malaysia)

baby's food :

nestum (by nestle)
gerber (by nestle)
agusha (by pepsico)

food seasoning/condiments :

maggi (by nestle)
heinz

chocolates :

kit kat (by nestle)
smarties (by nestle)
nuts (by nestle)
bon pari (by nestle)
aero (by nestle)
hersheys
cote d'or (by kraft)
toblerone (by kraft)
alpen gold (by kraft)
milka (by kraft)
vosdushni (by kraft)
cudniy vecer (by kraft)

dairy products :

actimel, danone, aktivia, danakor, danissimo, rastishka (yogurt products by danone)
biomax yogurt (by pepsico)
imunele yogurt (by pepsico)
domik v derevnye milk (by pepsico)
33 korovi milk (by pepsico)
cudo yogurt product (by pepsico)
philadelphia cheese (by kraft)
singles cheese (by kraft)
f&n susu pekat & susu sejat (f&n coca cola malaysia)
susu sejat cap junjung (f&n coca cola malaysia)
susu sejat cap ideal (f&n coca cola malaysia)
susu sejat cap carnation (f&n coca cola malaysia)
susu pekat & susu sejat cap tea pot (f&n coca cola malaysia)
magnolia milk (f&n coca cola malaysia)
farmhouse milk (f&n coca cola malaysia)

pet food :

friskies (by nestle)

d) hygiene-beauty care products

skin care :

neutrogena (by johnson & johnson)
clean & clear (by johnson & johnson)
garnier (by l'oreal)
the body shop (by l'oreal)
vichy (by l'oreal)
biotherm (by l'oreal)
kiehl's (l'oreal)
la roche posay (l'oreal)
skinceuticals (l'oreal)
clinique (by estee lauder)
cetaphil (by galderma, a joint venture company btwn l'oreal & nestle)

hair care :

redken (by l'oreal)
kerastase (by l'oreal)
shu uemura (l'oreal)
brylcreme hair care products (by sara lee)

cosmetics / frangrances / perfumes / luxury beauty care products:

revlon
maybelline (by l'oreal)
lancome (by l'oreal)
giorgio armani (l'oreal)
yves saint laurent (l'oreal)
ralph lauren (l'oreal)
shu uemura (l'oreal)
cacharel (l'oreal)
helena rubinstein (l'oreal)
diesel (l'oreal)
viktor & rolf (l'oreal)
bobbi brown (by estee lauder)
MAC (by estee lauder)

baby care products :

johnson & johnson (by johnson & johnson)
huggies (by johnson & johnson)
nestogen, neslac etc (by nestle)
dumex, dugro (by danone)
mamil gold (by danone)

women's :

kotex sanitary pad (by kimberly clark)
o.b. tampon (by johnson & johnson)
carefree pantiliner (by johnson & johnson)

health :

band-aid (by johnson & johnson)
vicks (by procter & gamble)
acuvue contact lense product (by johnson & johnson)

e) detergents & other house hold products:

kleenex tissue (by kimberly clark)
scott paper product (by kimberly clark)
kiwi shoe polish (by sara lee)
home depot

f) clothes & perfumes

designer label :

estee lauder
DKNY (by estee lauder)
polo (by ralph lauren)
ralph lauren
giorgio armani (by armani)
armani exchange (by armani)
emprio armani (by armani)
tommy hilfigher (by phillips-van heusen)
calvin klein (by phillips-van heusen)

retail shops :

GAP
banana republic (by GAP)
timberland
river island
marks & spencer
selfridges
the limited
la senza (by the limited)
victoria secret (by the limited)
wonderbra (by sara lee)
playtex (by sara lee)
DIM (by sara lee)
levi's

others :

delta galil, supply apparel products to other companies eg Marks & Spencer, Calvin Klein, Hugo Boss, Nike, Pierre Cardin, Barbie, Tommy Hilfigher, Auchan

g) cultural

cable tv & tv programme:

fox news (by news corporation)
national geographic channel (by news corporation)
american idol (by news corporation)
disney
CNN
HBO (by time warner)
cartoon network (by time warner)

movies, films, cinema :

fox film corporation (by news corporation)
20th century fox (by news corporation)
disney
warner bros (by time warner)

publications (novels, magazines, newspapers):

harper collins books (by news corporation)
disney
time magazine (by time warner)
DC comics (by time warner)

h) supermarkets / department stores

selfridges
marks & spencer
tesco
walmart
ASDA (by walmart)
carrefour (by pryca)
auchan
vegetables/fruits from israel
things with bar code starting with 729

allahu'alam..

...because we are Muslims

2011-06-26T18:58:00.000+08:00

Serabut

2011-06-26T18:11:00.000+08:00

Iye. Aku rasa serabut.

Semalam aku habis exam dah. Microb paper last. Hmm...memandangkan aku tak habis revise, aku rasa paper tu turned out to be better than I expected. Tapi macam biaselah, aku memang senang rase condifent. Tup2, belambak je insan2 lain yg dapat higher marks than me, 10-15 ketul. Haha.

Semalam hyper la jugak. Semester ni cam hape ntah. Dulu mase kat KMB aku rase susah, aku rase takpe kalau dpt suam2 kuku. Sebab aku bukan budak asrama. SPM pun tak stret A. Bile kat uni, ade jugak mentaliti budak tak matang tu. 'Aku cakap inggeris pun tak pandai sangat, apetah lagi dengan slang2 aussie ni. Kat mesia sgt exam oriented, so tak participate or tanya2 tutor/lecturer pun tak ape. Aku memang camni. Rajin (kot) tapi tak pandai nak involved2 sangat nih.'

Syukur aku sedar diri aku ni dah tua. 22 tahun dah. Pak cik mak cik blonde coursemates aku tu 18-19 tahun je. Diorang tak amik IB, aku amik~ 'insert evil laugh here'.

I mean seriously, mase first year, diorang ternganga kot bile dengar pasal 'DNA polymerase'. =_="

Ade orang kata. First year memang lah boleh dapat HD berderet sebab banyak repetition je drpd apa yg kita belajar kat Mesia. Honestly, aku takde lah lepak sangat 1st year. Tapi bile compare dengan 2nd year, 1st year tu memang easy breezy covergirl lah! Aku siap hairan kot, kenape ade sorang budak nih, belajar dasat giler tapi tak dapat HD utk Bio 1st year. Sekali 2nd year, dia potong aku most of the time. Sila gelakkan diri sendiri.

Ape sebenarnye aku nak cakap nih...

Semalam tgk Despicable Me, lawak dan original giler. Rio yg dari dulu aku nak tgk, akhirnya dpt jugak tengok. Hmm...ok je kot. Tapi watak Jamie Foxx dgn Will.i.am sangat lawak.

Hari ni...

Hmm, hari ni...

Aku sepatutnya beli ticket ke Sydney. Nak fly minggu depan kot sebenarnya. Nape aku postpone? Aku tak sure nak pegi ke tak sebab kawan aku tu ajak kakak dia. Tanpa disangka2 kakak dia setuju nak ikut. Adeh...mengarut betul.

Bila aku rasa nak buat chill je nanti, second penghalang ialah dua ekor guinea pig aku. Sape nak jage? Semalam ada kakak Phd yang sanggup jaga. Baguslah. Tapi seriusli aku rasa tak sedap nak tinggalkan diorang lama2 kat orang lain. :(

Takut rindu? Mestilah. Tapi diorang ialah guinea pig. And yeah, they do behave like pigs most of the time. Memang messy. Takut akak tu tak selesa pulak. Kawan aku tu pulak desak supaya datang awal so that boleh jalan Sydney sama2.

Entahlah...Sydney? Paddy's je kot yang affordable. Selainnya...mungkin aku lebih thrill untuk pegi Newcastle, Wollongong and Blue Mountain.

Planning...nak pegi mana, bila, naik apa. Haih. Bestnya kalau ade orang bawak jalan2, terangkan kena naik bus ape, pukul berapa. Kalau orang datang Adelaide, aku dgn besar hatinya nak buat camtu. Tapi yelah, bape kerat je kawan aku kat Aussie nih. Dengan aku ni yang socially retarded, even satu college, basically kenal2 camtu jelah, tak rapat sangat. Orang kampung aku tu pulak ala2 tak hairan pun aku nak datang. Kalau untuk orang lain, sanggup pulak datang Melbourne beriban kali. Haih~ Sebab aku macam orang kampung ke, mengingatkan dia tentang memory yang dia memang orang kampung?

So, aku ended up buat make over bilik hari ni. Hoho. Manusia memang tak pernah puas. Tengah2 kemas tadi, aku rasea nak meja study yang proper (since selama ni aku guna coffee table), tapi tu semua nafsu, Zue. Tengah2 tumblr pun aku rasa nak ber-ebay vintage pleated chiffon long skirt. Arghhh! Those are people's money not yours! Terkejut aku bile dapat tau sorang housemate aku simpan $400 setiap bulan. Aku macam 'wtf! (wow, that's fantastic')'. Aku dah la an ultimate food lover...

Oh ya. Tumblr is like a freaking disease. Like a bubonic plague epidemic. Memang addictive somehow. Haish. Kenapa aku terlalu tertarik dengan tumblr? Read

Kesimpulannya, sorang housemate aku kat gold coast sekarang, dua orang lagi tak habis exam, sorang tak balik2 lagi drpd buat part time job, aku pulak sangat tempted utk tgk movie lagi, tapi aku kene plan utk winter holiday nih.

Kurbaan - A Misleading Film About Islam?

2011-06-16T08:03:00.000+08:00

Alright, alright. I still watch Hindi movies and sometimes I enjoy them. It's freaking hard to find a decent Hindi film past 2000. Most of the time, they started to become more and more like Hollywood movies (sexy women, sexy scene whatever) but yeah, a handful were still wonderful such as 3 Idiots, Taare Zameen Par, Race, Munna Bhai MBBS, Faana, Jab We Met etc.

Early this year, I watched My Name is Khan. The film was very moving and I'm partly glad that a film like that was made and hugely successful. The message was pretty heavy, yet important, Islam never teaches us terrorism. It portrayed some values of Islam such as be good to everyone, not just Muslims, never miss your solat, etc. But there were some off points, such as, well, a Muslim guy cannot marry a non-Muslim woman but I guess there are widespread of 'mixed' marriages already (in India and Indonesia predominantly).

When I was studying Microbes yesterday, I feel like I couldn't take it anymore (5 days of study marathon almost made me vomit). So, I searched for any good movies on youtube, and I found Kurbaan.

Came from the same guy, Karan Johar (which in fact not a Muslim), the film still portrayed a mixed marriage between a Muslim and a Hindu. More off points this time, I mean who says you can kiss a girl before you are married to her. Wow, totally off! But I really, really, really hope that whoever watch this movie will not take in everything as it was.

Like, those terrorists in that movie, used their religion and their God's name as their ultimate motive. But really, those were just decoys since their real motive was revenge. Killing innocences will not get you a martyrdom. I mean honestly, they planted a bomb on pregnant woman and that was without her knowing. That's clearly not Islam.

I don't know, when that movie finished, I felt like calling the producer, urging him to show a few notes before the credit rolls, telling the audience, this is not Islam, that is not Islam. *sigh*

This got me thinking, we are so busy producing more engineers, doctors, scientists but media has a very powerful role right? We do need some people in that field so that our voices can be heard. I mean, Karan Johar is not a Muslim, we can't rely on him to make correct movie for us. Maybe his motivation was for humanity and that was already enough to get him going. Islam should be a stronger motivation for us then.

Hijab Talk

2011-05-31T13:05:00.000+08:00

Valley Of The Wolves Palestine

2011-05-31T11:15:00.000+08:00

Come on brothers and sisters, let's watch this movie.

The Uninvited Invited Guest

2011-05-27T11:33:00.000+08:00

Remember I mentioned about School of Earth and Environmental Science Dinner before? The dinner was last night and yes, I ate a lot.

Sakinah and I arrived quite early and we were just sitting at our seats while the drinking progressed. Almost everyone else was standing up with a glass of wine and we were thinking, oh, this is how they socialize. The 1st year undergrade prize were delivered first and the third prize winner was absent! Thus, I have no idea at all how to receive my award you see, like many times before this, there must be a rehearsal or something. Haih.

When it was my turn, I just walked and then only my brain started digesting what on earth should I do. And awkward enough, when my name was called, people were like went stationary? Like, 'that's a weird name', and only when the certificate was in my hand, they were started clapping.

Urgh, I simply felt out of place long since I enrolled in Ecology class. Maybe it was just uncommon for them, even for the lecturers and tutors to have any hijabers enrolled in such courses?

The head of the school keep mentioning to make new connections and people on our table were just cold and unfriendly except for a poise woman sitting two seats away from me. =)

Interesting enough, I sat beside my former lecturer, John Conran and well, well, he went away everytime he had a chance, maybe he was bored, maybe he felt weird sitting next to me. I did take an initiative and try to make conversation about Gondwana, how marsupials are not endemic to Aussie and why koalas are not found in Western Aussie or Tassie. But after he finished explaining, he just turned away and chat with the other person sitting next to him. =(

In short, that kind of extravagant dinner is just not for me. Makan dalam dulang ramai2 lagi syok kot!

The food:

The entree was Fresh SA Oysters. While I know this costs maybe as much as 5 kg of chicken, I simply couldn't finish it. At first, I thought it tasted okay but when Sakinah complained on how it was served raw, I was like...ermm...seriously? To be honest, that was the first time I ever eaten oysters, and the experience was not very encouraging.

The main course was Crispy Atlantic Salmon. I can never afford salmon this big, this fresh, this pink, and this delicious. Enough said.

The dessert was Apple Brulee. Legendary! Well, that was the first time I ever tasted a brulee too and yes, I'll be glad someone is kind enough to belanja me this beauty next time.

=)

2011-05-12T11:41:00.000+08:00

Something to cheer up my days...I'm trying so hard not to live my life in autopilot mode...

Yes, today is the first time I skipped a lecture (apart from Biomed lectures) this semester. I did that kind of act regularly with my Psychology and Ecology last year. And this year, I'm simply running out of course that I can skip the lectures without feeling like a total idiot afterwards.

And I seriously, seriously want to keep writing... Consistency Zue...Come on! Undergrad life ain't that hard if you keep your mind positive!

It's Friday

2011-04-01T13:20:00.001+08:00

It's Friday...Friday...gonna get down on Friday...

Urghh...

Crazy weekend...yesterday I had the last Prac A, worth potentially 10-15%, just now I had 15% Microbiology test, on Monday I'll have 10% Biochem written test, potentially 10% Biomed test and I 'll also have to submit 20% Biomed assignment on the same day.

Hardly breathe...let alone sleep @.@

Ah, as I mentioned before, these are the two 'bujang'. Nope, not the fancy guinea pig like what Saida has, but better for me I guess...less maintenance

Leggo (Legolas) on the left, Bugsy on the right

2 a.m in the Morning

2011-03-22T23:50:00.000+08:00

Oh yeah..It's 2 a.m Adelaide time and I haven't sleep yet.

Or I don't deserve to sleep yet. =_="

It wasn't a great Tuesday yesterday, my Gloria Jeans coffee spilled in my bag, my debit card got swallowed by that dam*ed ATM machine, and I have to punch my bus tickets four times.

Eh, it was still a lovely day. I bought another guinea pig! Ngahaha...(will post up the pic later).

Dunno why I'm so impulsive to get another one. I mean, Bugsy does need a companion but I got tonnes of things to do.

Haha...who says after IB you can start messing around all over again.

Not if you enrol in Biomedical Science.

For our Prac C, we need to discuss ethical issues surrounding two topics. One of the topics is Preimplantation Genetic Diagnosis (PGD) which was...

...my TOK presentation topic 2 years ago.

Aaaah...the deja vu.

No reasons to NOT score well on this one. Phew phew!

Calico

2011-03-17T17:37:00.001+08:00

I used to own a cat named Kitin (weird name, I know) but that was the first cat that I owned and her legacy lasted for 8 years, Comot was her grandson and he disappeared 2 years ago.

Kitin was a tricolour cat with orange, black and white coat. I still remembered when my mom first first saw her, she knew for sure already that Kitin was female!

My mom said, tricolor male cats are very rare and usually after they were born, their father will kill them.

Finally, I got an answer for my 10-years long mind-bogging conundrum.

Calico cats are almost always female because the X chromosome determines the color of the cat and a female cat has two X chromosomes. A common male cat has one X and one Y chromosome. Since the Y chromosome does not have any color genes, there is no chance he could have both orange and non-orange together. One main exception to this is the chromosomally abnormal XXY male which can be tortoiseshell or calico, but this is very rare. Most male calico or tortoiseshell cats are sterile due to the abnormality of carrying two X chromosomes.

Somehow it makes sense if the fathers of male calico cats would kill their sons because they are sterile?

Anyway, learning Genetics has been awesome so far! And I think my mom is a great Geneticist. =)

Kitin looked more or less like this cat

Current State

2011-03-02T11:38:00.000+08:00

Writing from the computer lab in Molecular and Life Science Building...

Since there's no internet connection yet at our new home...

Ironically, we moved to Paradise and we don't get what we want...

Ok, it's more of a need than a want since my assignment due as early as next Monday...

Nevertheless, it is very much Paradise-ish living there...

Frequent buses (super fast too!), close to Tea Tree Plaza, close to Linear Park where I can cycle regularly (slowly...trust me, even a kid pointed out 'that bike goes so slow' <-- hush u small little kid!), wooden flooring, crucial to insulate heat in the winter months...

Feels like burning down the Telstra building...

Thrill Seeker

2011-02-15T19:04:00.000+08:00

Moving house is super tiring. In fact, I didn't even had a chance to be reminiscing the relaxing days at home I experienced for the last two months. Urghh. Yes, I do feel depressed. I haven't been at home for numerous days, darting here and there, thanks for those who had interrupted my plans with their nonsense excuses.

I even break a record of not having a single note in my purse for the first time in my life!

Went to ATM already today though. Haha.

Gosh, if this how it feels like moving house, then I'm really glad my parents stayed in that one house since I was born until today.

*********************************************************************************

I wanted to accept the challenge my Biology tutor threw at me last semester, try to eat as many things that I never had a gut to try before. While I am young. =D

But in the past week, things didn't turn out too well. I tried Ikea's Gravad Lax (Slices of salmon marinated with dill, sugar and spices. Served with bread and salad.) There goes my $5.95 =( I think it taste nasty, seriously.

Next, I went to Aroma Cafe and tried Ristretto (a very short shot of espresso coffee).

Very short indeed.

In fact, I even asked the barista, 'are u done?'

Taste like... It wasn't that bad actually. Maybe I was pissed because I had to pay $3.10 for 30ml of coffee?

After a sachet of sugar and two teaspoon of my friend's cappuccino (desperately in need of some milk), I managed to drink it all down.

Next time, seek Mr Google before placing orders onto bizarre foods.

Perghh

2011-02-13T07:42:00.000+08:00

(Pronounce as Perth)

At first, I didn't put too much hope that I would be enjoying this city, but Perth definitely left me wanting more. Hoho.

1st day, 7 Feb

Touchdown at 5.20 a.m. Saved money on taxi as Aishah's brother gave us a lift down to Queens Park. Ehehe. Arrived at Kak Nabilah and Kak Syazwan's place. Chatted a few minutes, we went to bed straight away. (Well, Air Asia is never the most comfortable airline ever)

Even though we have checked out the transperth website beforehand, we were quite unsure to navigate ourselves on our own for the very first time, so we decided to go to the city together with the sisters at noon. (Read = we desperately needed to take forty winks first)

At Queens Park train station, it was total mayhem because we didn't have any coins at all to buy the tickets. Haih. But problem solved eventually and we felt quite amazed as we boarded the train. It was as fast as Melbourne's train. Urghh...why Adelaide's train goes at snail pace huh?

Our first activity...eat! We went to Taka's kitchen, a Japanese restaurant with super low prices. I ordered 10 salmon sushis and we sneaked out for a while for a dose of Ezy Way's Bubble Tea (which at the end of the day triggered an asthma attack =_="). Another bonus for Perth as we don't have Ezy Way in Adelaide. Double haih.

What happened to those 10 sushis? Well, starvation + misleading photos = an illusion. The sushis were like palm-size each and even with my mysterious ability to eat a lot, I could only stuffed five in.

Next, we walked to the Swan Bell. I...was...really...pissed...with the lady at the counter because she didn't tell us that by purchasing a ticket, we got 5-dollar-off-the-second-ticket-voucher. Huuu... Anyhow, the view was spectacular and the sound was...err...kinda irritating after a while. But, it was worth it after all.

A failed attempt to impersonate Tahnee, a former Australia's Next Top Model

After that, we caught bus no 37 to Kings Park. My asthma has started to choke me. And at time like this? Haih, I shouldn't have ever drink that bubble tea. After a long wait, we rode the bus for free all the way to Fraser Avenue but we got down one stop earlier. Uhuk. Then, I realized that the elevated section of the Lotterywest Federation Walkway closed at 5 p.m. Haih! At last, we just walked around the park (believe me, it was one maaaasive park), at last we sat under the shade, eating the remaining sushis and enjoying the view of Swan River and the city of Perth.

2nd day, 8 Feb

We rushed out early. Missing the cruise that we had paid for would be disastrous. Funny enough, I mistakenly look at the departing time to be at 9.15 am. So we literally ran from the train station to the Barrack Square. The actual departing time was at 9.45 am. Huhuh. Nevertheless, we were fortunate because if I remembered the other way around, we would be doomed.

On the Captain Cook Cruise, we got very excited at first but soon, we got bored. Haha! True enough, it was interesting to see those mansions built by the riches along the Swan River. Like they have nothing else to do with those big money they gathered!

They sell this picture for $20. What the...so I recaptured it. Haha

We arrived at Fremantle at 11.10 am. And...err...it was like a ghost town. Hmm... I guess because we went there on Tuesday as opposed on weekends. We walked down to the Townhall but along the way, there were old buildings all around, spectacular! It took a visit to the Information Center to find our way to Kailis'. LOL! I thought it is just a small restaurant! The fish and chip served was the best I ever had! I mean it. =) (Well, it was kinda pricey I guess).

Next, we caught the free CAT bus to the Fremantle Prison. I didn't plan to visit here at first as the entrance fee is kinda expensive and plus, I've been to Port Arthur Before. But this one tour, was definitely worth every penny. You could actually feel the chill ran though your spine as you walked into the capital punishment room.

Afterward, we rode on the CAT bus, circling the entire Fremantle town. Not too shabby. We got down at WA Maritime Museum. As it was the second Tuesday, entry was by gold donation only. Yay! Can't lie, there were certain parts that I found interesting but the rest... I'd be furious if I was to pay the full entrance fee. Hehe.

3rd day, 9 Feb

Last day. Frighteningly, we decided to go to Scitech, at City West even though it was obvious that the place was meant for the kids. I guess, my love for Science won me over but seriously, even the receptionist eyed us suspiciously. Anyway, it sure felt awkward at first, but soon enough we just didn't care anymore. Amazing3x. We did mourn as we failed to remember even the simple concept in Physics.

Back at the CBD, we dropped by to this Lebanese restaurant. The shish kebab was fantastic! Went to Woolies to buy gift cards for the sisters and brother who would then give us a ride to the airport. Although, it was 2.45 pm already, I was persistent to stroll along the London Court. No time to lose, we dashed to the Visitor Information and made our way across the Plaza before finally set our foot there. Worth it million times! =D

All in all, Perth surely doesn't disappoint me. Some of the things you may quickly notice.

1. Here, they walk real slow. Even slower than Adelaidians. Good thing if you don't want to be knock off just like what happened to me in Sydney.

2. They love reading? Apply even to the guys looking like some rock bands' vocalists.

3. A bit racist or more accurately anti-Muslims I guess. I've been there for a couple of days and received also a couple of inappropriate remarks. Took longer to collect that couple of remarks when I was in Adelaide and none in Tassie and Melbourne.

Egypt: Act Before React

2011-02-03T21:02:00.002+08:00

Crisis in Egypt...quoting Dr. Faisal Tehrani in his blog,

"Sesebuah revolusi hanya akan menjadi revolusi sekiranya kebangkitan rakyat sedia mengorbankan jumlah korban yang besar" (A revolution will only be a revolution if the uprising group of people, willing to sacrifice large number of victims)

and quoting my dear friend in his blog,

"Appointing a vice president will not do to end the long standing dictatorship. A complete retreat of the old government is what we demand."

...I couldn't agree more but I am deeply worried. Fine, avoiding any causalities would be an improbable ideal but I wonder...does whoever behinds this resistance against the current Egyptian Government has been really prepared? They are fighting against for new rulings, you see...indirectly fighting against the USA, fighting against the Israel. Are they really prepared to take over? I understand that a small and steady change will never work in this situation, only a radical change can be the cure in treating the chronically corruptive current Egyptian government.

In the name of Allah and Islam, I support and pray for the resistance. I hope they win. But I can't hide my worries. This is not an aimless doubt. I even unsure of calling it a doubt because I believe if their intention is truthful, then Allah will be on their side, on our side.

But I hope that they have think it through, you know...prepared with the experts and professionals who will fill in the missing cabinets after the old government has been taken down, prepared for the economics turmoils when they can no longer trade with the US and the Israel and most importantly, I hope they can control or at least do something to lessen the damage and the number of causalities sacrificed when Mubarak's reign retaliate back with the army of polices and soldiers carrying high-tech artilleries and weaponries.

And I can't help but suspects that maybe the escape of those criminals from Egypt's prisons were not by accidents.

Millions of innocent tourists and migrants are stranded in the middle of the battlefield. The inflation...as the name suggest, inflates rapidly leaving millions at the risk of starvation. *sigh* I don't know...I just hope that they could come with some kind of plan to settle this matter before starting the demonstration at the first place. Appointing flyers to bring them to safety first maybe...I don't know. Maybe I'm an idealist, maybe I'm just emotional.

They couldn't possibly come out with a perfect plan, I know. But I want to believe so badly, that whoever started all these, have consider every possibilities and the plan to overcome those carnage. And I also want to believe desperately, that whatever bad things that were already happened were unforeseen mayhems, not because they had rush the resistance up despite being not prepared yet. =/

Anti-government demonstrators grab a man, center, they suspect to be a supporter of Egyptian President Hosni Mubarak in Cairo's Tahrir Square, Egypt, Thursday, Feb. 3, 2011. The Egyptian military is taking up positions between anti-government demonstrators and supporters of President Hosni Mubarak. Soldiers did not intervene, other than firing warning shots, during attacks on the anti-government protesters Wednesday by Mubarak supporters. (AP Photo/Victoria Hazou)(Victoria Hazou - AP), The Washington Post

Happy Ending

2011-02-01T19:29:00.002+08:00

Yes, alhamdulillah. My driving licence saga ends with a happy ending. =)

The JPJ officers assisted our test today were very competent and surprisingly, warm and friendly. Fuh! Which makes me remember about the earlier process of getting my health check up form certified, how I was so unsatisfied with their service. Please refer to these posts, I Need a Lifetime Driver, I Dropped My Case, and Dear Pengarah JPJ Johor.

For my second letter to the Director, I did received a response from his staff but I was well, too pissed out to read it out. Until just now. I mean, I wonder...if the officers themselves are very well-mannered, the staffs must've been reminded to behave the same...or better!

So this is the response:

Assalamualailum / Dear Lisa

Hi there, my name is XXX and I am the person who’s in charge in Bahagian Pelesenan Pemandu. Regarding your two emails, I on behalf of my colleague were really want to take a deeply sorry for what was happened on two days u were in JPJ. About the photocopy service in JPJ, yes there was a photocopy service in JPJ but for your information, the owner has passed away for the last three months and until now there is no one took over his place. For your information, the service is rendered to the outsider not the JPJ's staff. So, I am so sorry to hear that you paid 50cent to make copy on your IC as you get the service outside the JPJ's building. However, I believe that my colleague had inform you that kind of service can be get at near JPJ's canteen BUT if none of my colleague didn’t inform you so, again, I am so sorry.

I also want to take another sorry when one of my colleagues had unintentionally spelled your name incorrectly. During that time, there were so many customers waiting in lines and that perhaps makes him/she lost concentration or misses alphabets of writing your names correctly. Regarding the JPJ’s building, I hope what had been explained by my Director has make you satisfied and we at Bahagian Pelesenan Pemandu will be more alert if an OKUs were in JPJ, we will serve you from A to Z at our Bahagian Khidmat Pelanggan.

Your second email also had drawn my attention on what was actually happen on the last Friday. First of all, I am so sorry that you have to wait long to get you health check letter. Yes, Puan XXX whose entertain you had unintentionally forget to give back you letter. I’ve been informed by her that during that time, there were so many candidates waiting in list and you were one of them. My colleague at the back office was so busy to prepare all the letters until miss look your letter. This I agreed it was our false and again, I by myself took another sorry and I promise that this thing will be never ever happen again.

Regarding the counter number 6, that counter is purposely for driving institute agents which by right not for the public. I will take an action to remind my colleague not to eat/drink or reading novel/ newspaper while in counter. For your information, in government, staff can choose working hours between 7.30am-4.30pm, 8.00am-5.00pm and 8.30am-5.30pm.

Once again, Bahagian Pelesenan Pemandu and I personally would like to apologize for any inconveniences since you were in JPJ. Thank you.

Hmm...isn't that nice.

So. Lesson of the day, if u have anything to complain about, let the person responsible know about it. Maybe your complain will be the stepping stone in improving the public services in Malaysia. =)

Egypt: Let's Think For A While

2011-01-31T22:03:00.002+08:00

With a handful of rumours and unverified news spreading around regarding the riots in Egypt...a female student has been raped, a student shot in Tanta...we have to be extremely cautious when separating the facts from the speculations. One of my friends posted on his FB wall:

Update Mesir: Alhamdulillah, keadaan masih terkawal. Mahasiswa-mahasiswi Malaysia di Mesir ok belaka. Mereka perlu berjimat makanan dan belanja (ATM masih tak boleh guna utk keluar duit). Berita mahasiswi dirogol adalah palsu. Berita pelajar kena tembak di Tanta benar, tetapi dgn peluru getah yg terkena kaki. Beliau hanya meminta kita mendoakan mereka. (terkini dari Presiden PMRAM)

If the above statement is correct, then that's a relief. I'm not saying that the person who said that her friend's sister has been raped in the wide-spread facebook screenshot was telling a tall-tale but you know, when words were passed mouth to mouth, every little details might be missing or modified somehow along the way.

Anyhow, I would like to end this post with this verse from Quran

Wahai orang-orang yang beriman, jika datang kepada kalian orang fasik dengan membawa berita, maka telitilah berita itu agar kalian tidak memberikan keputusan kepada suatu kaum tanpa pengetahun sehingga kalian akan menyesali diri atas apa yang telah kalian kerjakan. (49:6)

Concerns

2011-01-31T21:00:00.001+08:00

Just watched Buletin Utama, regarding the flood in several parts of Johore and Malacca...Segamat, Labis, Tampin and...Kota Tinggi, my hometown. In Kota Tinggi, the water level has risen up to 1 meter and is expected to continue to rise due to the excessive water in Kota Tinggi River.

Actual photo of 2011 flood at Kota Tinggi, courtesy of Mr. Supian Hadi Othman

Alhamdulillah, I live about 25 km from the town of Kota Tinggi, thus, so far my Felda is not affected by the continuous rain and never in the history too, we ever been affected. Hopefully, it will stay that way.

If u ask me, there're certainly too many things going through my mind just now. I can't lie, I am worried. Tomorrow will be the day of my JPJ test and the nearest JPJ office is in Johore Jaya. For the officers to come to my driving institute, they have no choice but to pass through Kota Tinggi. I don't know if that's possible anymore. Cancelling tomorrow's test equals to 'I have to wait for another 2 years and I also have to start from scratch since my L licence will expire by then'.

If the officers do come through, if the rain continues to fall, the road surface, the visibility will be affected and I'm not sure if I can perform my best if that happens. Don't misunderstand me, I do believe that rains bring blessing (rahmat) but yeah, I can't deny my concerns about that.

Right now, I also have many issues regarding the process of finding a new house in Adelaide. My housemates and I are trying to find another house since our current house is kind of far from the Uni. Plus, there aren't many buses that serve our bus stop. The process has been a bit nightmarish...huhu. At first, we made a deal with a senior to move in together with us. Unfortunately, the person who supposed to replace that senior in her current house is not entirely accepted by that senior's current housemates. So, that senior can't simply move out. Unfortunately, that decision was made far too late and we already spent the last one month and a half, searching for a house with 4+ bedrooms which aren't surprising, can only be afforded by 5 people.

Now, most of the shortlisted houses are simply too expensive for the four of us. Frustrating? U bet I am.

Currently, we are trying to apply for well, any suitable houses that we can afford, too bad, completing an online application is just tedious. Each and everyone of us has to fill up the same form despite only one form required if we apply by hand using hard copy form.

But the thing that I am most worried about right now is if the rain continues to pour, the worsening floods may hinder me from reaching the airport. Moreover, the flight may be delayed or canceled altogether if the poor weather persists.

Well, as u may noticed if u're close enough to me, I can be over-analyzing and over-thinking at times but I feel I should write all my concerns, lay them all down one by one, so that I can evaluate my options.

Somehow, all my concerns seem insignificant compare to what currently has happened in Egypt. May Allah protects us all. Ameen~

Change of Thought

2011-01-31T01:31:00.000+08:00

I was once a Gleek, I admit it. I was hopeful...reading the rave reviews by the critics...watching the first few episodes from Season 1 (well, I had to fly to Australia already at that time). I thought it was different you know, depicting a typical high school life in a new light (not as cheesy as, well, High School Musical). I even thought that it can be a family show! I miss watching a laid-back comedy series, I haven't done that since...ehehe...my Disney days (Lizzie Mcguire, That's So Raven etc). <--- Ok, this may be a little bit embarassing.

But, that's how it was you know. As I was becoming a teenager, I rather stick to serious action series such as CSI, Alias and the EARLIER seasons of Smallville than watching those slapstick comedy series

Urghh...I was so dissapointed after watching the 1st episode of the 2nd season and wiki-ing the storyline for the rest of the season. Boy, I was wrong. It was never meant to be a family show where teenagers can find relief if they feel out of place in school, where parents can dig deeper into what teenagers nowadays face in their school life so that they can be more supportive. Jeez...the series now seem to me like they are trying to promote STD transmission.

And yet, the series still won the Golden Globe Best TV Series, Comedy/Musical. *sigh* It got me remembered, that someone once told me, in order for any actresses to win the Best Actress in the Academy Awards, they have to be nude or have a bed scene or...err...both in the nominated film. I just laughed it off but so far, that person consistently proved that she does have a point. *shrugs*

Floaters

2011-01-29T20:12:00.000+08:00

Thanks to my partner-in-crime, MuSyaJoh for sparing me a lifelong conundrum. (By posting a Wiki link on FB)

I never thought that those wriggly transparent worm-like stuff are for real. I mean, I considered 1) parasites and 2) supernatural thingy.

I know...what the heck!

I thought that maybe...just maybe I can see the unseen? You know, like maybe those are the spirits lying around? Like, the unseen may not be these horrifying creatures depicted in the horror movies? Hehe

Opposite Spin

2011-01-28T19:48:00.001+08:00

No, fortunately I'm not referring to the electrons.

The classic battle between Islam and Jahiliyyah around us, and worth noting, inside of us...

I feel that those two opposing forces are getting stronger against each other...

The Islam side:

Well, maybe it's just me because I only being introduced to usrah, tarbiyyah and da'wah when I was in KMB even though I already learnt the theory formally in schools (well, the theory and practical aspects are miles apart). And I believe organisations after organisations built for this purpose managed to attract members exponentially specifically in the last decade despite being under the radar previously.

Statistics by CNN also shows that the population of Muslim boost up to 200% in countries such as Canada and most European countries.

Well, hopefully the increase in quality follows the increase in quantity. =)

The Jahiliyyah side:

Believe it or not, going back to Malaysia prove this point clearer for me. Maybe because majority of the population are Muslims themselves. But flipping through the pages of the national newspapers only gives me an eye sore. Hmm...I don't think I should elaborate more, should I? I mean, the politics, the celebrity gossips...unnecessary, simply unnecessary. "A politician lost 5 pounds because of his campaign for the election?", "An artist who wear tudung went to an award ceremony with a male friend because she did not know who to go to with?".

And what's up with the flooding of supernatural thriller dramas and films? So that, the children are more afraid of ghosts and The Creator Himself? Oh, I forgot, those stories are selling well.

This one point is kinda obvious to me. During 1990s, caught watching Mariah Carey's My All music video and you would be treated as if you just watched a porno movie. Seriously. And I could recall clearly the uproar caused by the incident of Madonna kissed Britney in MTV VMA 2003. At that moment, that act felt so unnatural and unlawful to the world. But nowadays, girls kissing or boys kissing (euwwh!) seems to be the most natural thing in the universe? I mean, you could see that kind of stuff in music video of Lady Gaga, Katy Perry, Christina Aguilera, movies like Black Swan, Milk, Jennifer's Body etc. Nope, no more massive uproar. People already get used to it or shall I say, they are now being more open-minded and acceptive regarding this matter.

Complaining, criticizing, is that all I wanted to do?

Certainly not.

I still feel the weight of choosing a side even though the answer is crystal clear. It is not as easy as differentiating black from white.

It'll become easier as I learn to put forward Allah and His Prophet more than anything else, I believed.

I've been drifting away so many times...but then I realized that I'll never gonna be satisfied with what this temporary world (dunia) has to offer. Never.

The Past Five Days

2011-01-27T20:54:00.000+08:00

I learn that we should always contain our anger because people who never get angry are the strongest.

But can I be angry with myself though?

Because I've been committing stupid mistakes after stupid mistakes lately. I don't know if I should use the word 'stupid' but that's it, man...I'm like, what is wrong with me? Urghhh...

1. Selecting Transnasional bus instead of Plusliner for a return trip to Seremban even though the trip costs more time and fortune. And I mean lotssss of time. Lousy service. I wish I could curse the driver all day but then you know what, it was my mistake in the first place, which obviously didn't make me feel better. Haha!

2. Getting off the bus at Terminal 1 instead of Terminal 2 just because everyone was getting off the bus too even though I know Sakinah was waiting for me at Terminal 2. Fortunately, we accidentally could catch up with Aishah afterwards due to my err...stupidity?

3. Giving up to go to Felda's meeting after I reached KL central with tonnes of difficulties just because I don't want to be labeled as not punctual and not disciplined enough. Just get into the dam*ed taxi, will you? And thank God I did after wasting 10 minutes, thinking about how egoistic I was, which of course made me even more late. (the meeting wasn't worth going though =_=")

4. Oh, I also wore a pair of jeans instead of a pair of slacks or easier, a baju kurung for that meeting. Needless to say more right?

5. To top it off, I also skipped today's driving lesson just because I want some extra time sleeping. Lesson of the day: never, and I mean, NEVER ask for my decision when I was just out of bed, reluctantly. Just FORCE me to wake up! Mom, you've become so lenient these days. And congratulations to me, my JPJ test is on this coming Tuesday, I haven't been practicing for a full week, I only have Saturday and Monday to be prepared.

And many more mistakes that I feel too shameful to let others know. I mean, revealing your own skeleton in the cupboard is plain wrong, more importantly Allah despise that act. Hopefully, you can learn from my mistakes because I put it there for the world to see is not to embarrassed myself.

It's scary how I can never be old enough to not commit anymore stupid things in my life.

Hey, hey...be a little bit optimist.

Yeah, I'm trying here.

Live without regrets. Live without regrets. Live without regrets. Live without regrets...(chanting the same line 888x)

Hijab: The Misconception

2011-01-14T20:11:00.000+08:00

When I came back to Malaysia for this holiday, I was actually overwhelmed by the appearance of shawl. There are so many designs, from rainbow in color, crumpled, gypsy-style, wave-style...I can simply said, the shawl market is not just booming, it is currently bursting. Half of my heart adores the level of creativity invested in designing those shawls but another half of my heart is aching.

It was so scary to find those inners with artifical high bun because I vaguely remember a hadith regarding this matter, then alhamdulillah, I found THE hadith from a facebook note from a friend of mine.

“ akan muncul dalam kalangan umatku di akhir zaman, kaum lelaki yang menunggang sambil duduk di atas pelana, lalu mereka turun di depan pintu-pintu masjid. Wanita-wanita mereka (isteri mereka atau anak perempuan), berpakaian tetapi seperti bertelanjang (nipis & ketat). Di atas kepala mereka pula (wanita) terdapat bonggolan (sanggul atau tocang) seperti bonggol unta yang lemah gemalai. Oleh itu laknatlah mereka semua. Sesungguhnya mereka adalah wanita-wanita yang terlaknat”- hadith riwayat Ahmad, jil.2, ms. 223. (I honestly don't know how to determine the quality of a hadith, so I hope if this hadith's status is regrarded as weak, please inform me)

Moreover, some of today's shawl designs are made from semi transparent fabric and the width is actually not wide enough to cover a woman's chest properly (especially those made from crumpled fabric). But I'm kinda relieved to find that some blogshops do sell long inner that can cover till neck and those are selling pretty fast, meaning that most of women nowadays do understand the concept of 'aurat' is not just about covering the skin but also covering the shape.

That said, I do realize that sometimes I wear my shawl inside of jacket, which automatically means I don't let my shawl falls below my chest area. But as far as I remember, I only did that when I feel that my jacket is loose enough. But maybe for others who perceive don't think that way, please remind me because well, our own perception can be deceiving sometimes.

So, while blogwalking today, I found a highly controversial post entitled Gadis Tudung, Shawls Melaram. Honestly, even though some may argue that the way the post was written was kinda inappropriate because it is considered as revealing some people's 'aib' (Post 1, Post 2, Post 3), the author sure does has a message. Simply put, how about we grab the essence of the post itself and evaluate ourselves, am I one of those girls?

I did hyperventilating after finished reading that post. I mean, if you ask me, I am kinda grateful that I am not considered as being on the pretty side...you know what I mean? So, I am positive that unless I did something daring, men won't be attracted to me? So, I admit that sometimes I feel that I have more freedom in what I wear? Okay, you may call me stupid but I have this thought, 'no matter how 'vogue' I looked during my tutorial class, the guys in that session will never lay their eyes on me. Duh, I got this hot blonde wearing hot pants sitting next to me'. Fuh, this thought is so wrong isn't it?

Those who knew me will noticed that I have a passion for fashion. Not that I have an equally explosive wardrobe but I feel satisfied whenever I can work one garment and match it with many different looks. Again, not many things as extravagant as maxi dress, jumpsuit or blazer that you can wear freely in Malaysia and still not making you looking like a celeb wannabe. But when I was in Aussie, I can virtually put on anything and still look underdressed compare to those Aussie babes.

So, if you asked me, my fashion sense mainly derived from my desire for self-satisfaction, creativity, looking like a professional young woman whom people will take seriously and my love for colors apart from the ultimate purpose to cover my aurat. But then, maybe I have been careless few times before and I humbly apologize to You, may I always be given the opportunity to seek guidance from You.

Another very important lesson, sometimes it doesn't take an ulama' or an ustaz to bring you back to the correct path. I learnt something valuable today from a blogger. A lesson sparked from this post. =)

Spread the campaign!

p/s: A reminder for myself too =)

Tempo

2011-01-11T15:21:00.002+08:00

Do u ever heard anyone karaoke-ing in a middle of a wedding ceremony (which is a common sight in Johore), totally off beat? Sometimes the verses were sang quicker, sometimes slower than the melody of the song.

Do u ever saw anyone dancing on *ehem* a dance floor on the top floor of KMB gymnasium (which is never a common sight for boys of KMB) with no rhythm whatsoever. When others spin left, she spins right.

I can safely say that I'm not one of them. Haha! Even I may not be the best singer or dancer you ever found.

I'm not sure if the rule applies to my driving skill. Urghhh.

Well, I'm not as terrible as before, I have finally been allowed to drive on my own in the circuit today. (Heh, not impressive at all actually considering I've spent around 4-5 hours behind the wheels already)

Jeez...I need to learn my timing, quickly.

"Awak ni kejap belok awal, kejap belok lambat"

-My driving instructor-

I'm trying okay...really hard. =_="

Some of his other epic remarks

Nape balas kanan awal sangat? Awak ingat body kereta tu boleh bengkok-bengkok?

Awak kene paksa diri awak pandai cepat. Awak da nak balik...mane tu..Nepal? *giggling*

Phailed

2011-01-03T21:22:00.000+08:00

Ok. Since I decided to take Development Economics as one of my subjects next semester, I plan to read the book which my course coordinator has suggested, The End of Poverty by Jeffrey Sachs during my precious holiday. (Read: I used my Malaysian address instead of Australian address).

So, I searched on Ebay and I found one that is quite cheap compared to the rest. I.just.can't.believe.I.missed.one.very.important.detail.

Shipping: Small Packets - International - Ground

Ground

It sure will haunts me till the rest of my life.

I just realized that truth when the seller sent me this e-mail

Hi Zuleeza:

Thanks for your recent purchase. I mailed the book a few days ago. Travelling by boat it will take 3 to 4 months to arrive. It will get there. It just takes time.

Boat

3 to 4 months to arrive

T_T

Need For Closure

2011-01-03T15:35:00.000+08:00

Reading these two posts, Teenage Dream and Ambition written by two my dear friends really hit me. When my 2nd grade teacher asked me what is my hobby, I once answered 'mereka cipta' = inventing. She asked twice because she didn't believe what she just heard and by the time she got it, she laughed.

Hehe. My imagination seemed limitless back then. I used to at least try to build a barbecue place, a tool shed, a goldfish pond (turned out to be silly, because goldfish was never meant to live in a muddy pond), a garden in my room and what else, I can't remember anymore. Some of the idea worked, some didn't (obviously, when your idea is larger than life). Maybe growing up without any long-lasting close friends propelled me to push the boundary of what a primary school student should do (playing buaya2, sembunyi ibu, pepsi cola etc).

Too bad I never understand Physics to be a 'traditional' inventor. I like the applications part but the concepts? I'm 100 years too young to understand those. Haha. Such a shame really when I used to dream about being an astronaut, a lawyer when I phailed miserably in Physics and some parts of Philosophy.

So, I growing up, really interested in Science, Chemistry and Biology to be exact. But again, I'm 100 years too young to understand higher level Chemistry. No surprise, I decided to be a scientist. But there are tonnes of specialization out there, zoologist, botanist, oceanist, yada yada. Huh! I screamed 'later' and I'm good with just 'a scientist' at that point.

Alhamdulillah, I was given a chance to pursue that dream. And Alhamdulillah once again, along the way, about few months ago, I finally realized how I supposed to modify my ambition from being just a scientist to something else. I love Microbiology and Immunity so much, more than I love Genetics, Biochemistry, Pharmacology, or any other pathways in Science. ^^ Looks like I can be an inventor after all!

I honestly don't know what my sponsor has in store for me in years to come (since I have 10 years contract with them). But here's my plan for the time being. 2010-2012: a degree, 2013, an honors, 2014-2015, a PhD. Hmm...I can only work when I reached 27 years old? Hmmm... I mean, so what if I seem old by then, lets face it, that's the best thing that can happens to me. Ameen~

p/s: I seriously don't know what's the point of this post, really.

Frg/10

2011-01-01T21:54:00.001+08:00

I have this habit of forgetting.

Not bad entirely though. It can be good sometimes. Most of the time. At least that's what I thought.

How shall I put it. I'm not someone who can look back at my past mistake, and having a good laugh about it. I mean, of course that's what I should do right? Growing up, being a kid, being a teenager, there must be some mistakes that we have made because of our immaturity, our foolishness. I honestly don't know why I can't take it easy.

So, somehow I chose just to forget. Well, if I'm being frank, that's sound like a real coward and choosing to forget because I want an easy way out. Nothing to be proud really, but that's how I've been living so far.

Along the way, inevitably I lost tonnes of my memories. If you ask me, I seriously can't remember most of my childhood days. Such a shame actually. Although it remains the worst phase of my life, there must be something good about it. After all, it was my childhood days, of course I was having fun once in a while if not always. Too bad I can't remember those days either.

Maybe I should have a good laugh at myself. All this time, when I remembered the good old days, but then, when they reminded me, even giving a slight clue or cue to the bad times, I quickly shut down my memory. No surprise that both of the good and bad memories are all wiped out since they are complementary.

Since forgetting has become a habit, I found myself keep forgetting. Huh! What an tautology! Hehe. What I meant is, I found it hard to recollect my days at secondary school and KMB.

I took a long time to remember or couldn't remember many of the teachers at SMKS.

I can't remember how the path that I took to class everyday at KMB look like.

Funny how I know I'll forget even more and I don't know what to do to stop it.

Hey Apple!

2010-12-28T21:56:00.002+08:00

Gotta love this one comment

"she ates the apple just after it got dropped on the floor , be gross....not delicious in this case..."

Reuniting the Hearts

2010-12-26T12:26:00.001+08:00

Wowowow...

I was this close from not going to the reunion yesterday. I had a menstrual pain attack, my sis can't pick me up from my other sis' house, and I technically don't have anything to wear. Yesterday's dress was fresh from the parcel I purchased from Lowyat's pre-order. Hehe.

Before the event itself was a complete drama. Man, I seriously feel guilty. Like, I've promised myself not to interfere with this joint event because last time I checked, when I interfere, I'll ended up interfering too much until I have to organized the event by myself and then only my cliques will turn out for the event (you got it, I'm not close with everybody).

So, this time around, I was thinking, if this one person respect Zaharah or close to Mira or something like that, they'll come to the event. Maybe that will attract more crowd. But then why oh why, they have to pick McD as the venue? *sigh* Well, you can't expect that I'll be silent right?

Then, when my comment started to divide the guests, I took back my words and said, I don't mind if I have to bring my own food. Well, the boycott target will not be fully achieved but I can't stand ruining the event couldn't I? I also didn't know why I'm so light-mouthed (or in this case, light-handed) to suggest KFC instead.

And then, towards the end, I suggest my sister's restaurant instead. Urghh!! It looked like I don't have a backbone or something. I was actually feeling torn because I was not convinced yet with my sister's restaurant services and plus, I can't approximate at all how many of us will turn up. So, McD seems to be a better option but you know, I gotta help my sister's business no matter how.

In the end, I don't know if there's anyone who came to the wrong venue because of the confusion or how many of us who didn't want to turn up because it seemed like I've took over the event from Zaharah. *sigh*

Ok, leave all the drama aside, yesterday, I had a blast. I've realized on how much I've changed to this serious-somewhat-mature-matron-ish-silent-not-interested-in-socializing-girl. I used to be this animated, loud, full of life girl. While I think the change is necessary, surviving in a foreign country, I'm already 21 years old, my course is rather serious and all that, I miss my old self you know. Honestly, I can't imagine myself putting on that colorful shawl that Nab had purchased or Shalin's pink ribbon shawl clip. LOL.

Meeting Rafi again was somewhat surreal. I mean, we didn't have enough time to catch up! How can I believe that when, we did nothing other than fighting before we went to Aussie. =D

Stop and Stare

2010-12-23T20:41:00.000+08:00

Well, to be honest, up until now, I'm still not getting use to people staring at me. I mean, one look is enough to notice that I'm a bit different. I thought I'm gonna have a rough time fitting in at Uni because of my look, but surprisingly, my lack of ability to converse fluently in English is a bigger hurdle than the way I look. Ha-ha.

Honestly, it's a great mystery to me that the Aussie in general don't seem to care about my difference. Like, in Malaysia, generally when people are meeting me for the first time, no matter how hard they are trying to hide that 'look' on their faces so that I don't feel hurt, I can't help but noticing that 'look' even for a fracture of seconds.

I mean, I don't know if it is only applies to a small population of Australians that I've met so far. But in their country, I feel like I've been treated normally for the first time, no more strange look or people turning in my direction twice so that they can be sure that they aren't hallucinating. If that's just the way how they've been brought up, how they were taught in school, to respect and to be kind to people with disability like me, then they have succeeded by leaps and bounds.

The stares were one of the things that was getting on my nerves two three weeks after I landed in Malaysia for this holiday. I ended up screaming at a little girl who was staring at me 'What is your problem?' at KFC KLCC back then. That girl must've think I was a psycho. Whatever.

And then yesterday, again at KFC Plentong, another little girl laughed at me because I was using children sink, 'tu kan utk budak2'. Dear innocent girl, how I'm supposed to use the so-called 'adult sink' if you and your mom were using it at the first place? After her mom was gone, that was when she spoke her magical line 'tu kan utk budak2'. She still didn't notice my face at that point, so I lifted my face and glare at her eyes on the mirror. The poor kid abruptly stop laughing and froze. Hahaha! She must had thought she had seen a ghost or something. Wow, I do feel mean right now.

Lesson for the day, please, when you'll have children in the future, remember to teach them, NEVER to eye people who are slightly different than them because for God sake, it is irritating, uncomfortable and most definitely RUDE especially when suddenly your charming daughter or son said something like this 'Mom, what happened to her eye?' along with finger pointing at me and the next thing you know is a hundreds pair of eyes are staring back at me.

Wow, I'm a celebrity now.

Seriously, I've been there many many times before.

Behind the Steering Wheel

2010-12-20T22:00:00.000+08:00

Ok, u may have gone bored with my 'Driving Licence Saga' but I can't stop writing about that if it was such an enthralling experience.

I'm now officially waiting for my L licence to come out. After literally fighting my way even just to secure a permission to learn how to drive, an L licence is definitely my claim to fame.

Here how it went. Yesterday was the most intimidating 45 minutes of my life. I know I was supposed to do a 3 hours practical but with such a large class, we have to share the instructor which I really don't mind because 45 minutes was already too much to handle for me.

I expected that I only gonna do simple back and forward motions, some turns but it turned out waaaaay beyond my expectation. I had to do the u-turn, straight parking, climbing hill, and driving on the open road as well! (which is of course is not allowed yet...but it was a bonus! yeay)

Urghhh...I can't even believe how patient my intsructor was. I'd kill to have him teach me if I was given another instructor. U see, I have this fear of pain (agliophobia) which automatically making me fear of height, fear of needle, fear to some animals. Well, I would say maybe it wasn't up to the level of a phobia yet but anything that can inflict me some form of pain, will brings discomfort to me.

I guess it couldn't be helped anyway because I want to overcome my fear so so badly. So, there I was, in the driver seat, never had the experience of driving a car, with basically 0.5% of knowledge about cars. The 'Kancil' suddenly seemed massive and heavy with momentum and could potentially be a weapon of mass destruction. Okay, maybe I was overthinking.

It was such a shame because I'm always this speed freak when it comes to gaming. I can basically freeze my ass the whole day, playing Need For Speed. I guess you need more than a press of a button to get the car turning left. I genuinely hope that my instructor will continue on to have a trust in me because I think I looked dumb yesterday? Gosh, being an idiot is the last thing that I wanna be, I mean, I may not lose my composure if someone said I'm not pretty or rich or kind? But stupid?

What's wrong with me anyway, I'm thinking too much. Again.

Dear Pengarah JPJ Johor

2010-12-17T17:41:00.003+08:00

Dear Sir,

I respect you and appreciate your quick reply previously but clearly, nothing has changed in the way your staffs were dealing with the customers. In fact, the service has gotten worse.

Today I have to go to JPJ again to return my health check letter. I arrived at 2.30 pm, waited for the door to be opened at 2.45 pm, I got number 2182. When my number was called, I handed the letter to one of your staffs at counter 4, XXX. She asked me to wait for a while.

At 3.30 pm, I came to counter 4 again to ask about the status of my permission letter, XXX went to the back (to the office maybe). She returned to her desk and told me, my letter hasn't finished yet.

So, I waited again. Do you know how long that I had to wait? Until 4.50 pm, the time when JPJ was about to be closed! At that time, the turn has reached for number 2279. I waited for more than 2 hours, the number was almost an addition of 100 to my number, 2182. I got the letter only when I stood and XXX innocently asked 'adik tak dapat surat lagi ye?'. Oh my God, did she completely forgot about me when I sat there waiting right at her face? Maybe it wasn't her fault because in my opinion, someone's at the back office should come down to the front and bring the letter.

And it was only 1 page of letter! Can you believe it? In order for me to get a 2 pages of letter, I had to wait for 1 hour and a half, in order for me to get 1 page of letter, I had to wait for more than 2 hours? Is that the rule, sir? I genuinely hope that at least something will be done, I don't want anyone else to experience what I had experience for these past two days.

I'm also disappointed with one of your other staffs. She only went to her counter, counter 6, for driving institute at 3 pm. She was eating right at her desk. Moreover, she also read a novel at her counter. I understand if she didn't have any work at that moment, but eating and reading a novel at her counter? That was so unprofessional. She also went back at 4.35 pm. That was too early, don't you think?

One of JPJ's staffs has responded to my complains. [Click]

I Dropped My Case

2010-12-17T07:09:00.000+08:00

Onto JPJ only. =)

Last night itself, I e-mailed both the director of JPJ Johor and HSAJB about what I've going through. Well, minus the cynical part.

It was not even an hour since I pressed the button sent, I got a reply from Pengarah JPJ Johor, Hj Mohd Rosli bin Ramli. I can't really copy paste exactly what he wrote because this is a public blog but I can ascertain u that he admitted his staff's mistake and wanted to investigate into that matter. He was so humble! This is a kind of leader that we need in Malaysia today. Well done, Mr Hj Mohd Rosli!

I Need A Lifetime Driver

2010-12-16T19:13:00.002+08:00

My body is actually still shaking...not sure if it is because of anger or disappointment. One thing for sure, today has been a hellish day.

The story goes like this. Before I came back to Malaysia, I already gave up trying to get a driver licence. First because I don't have enough money previously and second, I know it'll be complicated for me to get one. Hell yeah, I was right.

But when I met my old friends last week, I felt enthusiastic once again because they all already got their driver licence and I thought, if they could do it, why can't I?

So, I went to a driving institute in my place, the person in charge didn't mentioned anything about how my procedures will be different that those of normal people. I gladly paid for the introductory classes and tests, there goes my RM210. Then, she asked for passport photos. I didn't even know I have to submit those, so I decided to take pictures right there at that moment. So, the owner of the institute himself came out to take my pictures. Then, he came clean that no matter how, I have to have a conformation letter from a government's doctor.

Well said, I went to Hospital Kota Tinggi the next day. At first, I went to the eye clinic but the nurses there asked me to go to pesakit luar department instead. When getting my number, the person in charge insisted that I must have a letter from JPJ before seeing the doctor. My father insisted, so the person allowed me to see the doctor anyway. I waited for at least 1 hour and a half. When I finally met the doctor, she said a memo was the only thing she could give since I didn't have any letter from JPJ. I already got the uneasy feeling that this may not be the end of it.

So, I carried on as usual. I went to the 5 hours excruciating KPP and got registered with no problem. The next day, I received a call from the institute, she explained that they have made a mistake. The proper procedure is for me to get a letter from JPJ, go to see a doctor, and come back to JPJ again to hand in the conformation letter. Damn!

Since the next day was the computerized test, I have to postpone my visit to JPJ. Hell yeah, I scored full mark for my test.

So today I went out from my home very early, about 8.30 a.m, with the traffic jams and road constructions, I arrived at JPJ at 10.30. The person there asked for a photocopy of my IC and my OKU card. My father almost went out to get me but, hey, I don't know I have to prepare those. Ok, maybe I should predict that but it was so unacceptable, that enormous JPJ, don't have a photocopying service, they used to have one but not anymore. I don't care, they should have that service anyway. So, my father offered himself to go to nearby insurance agency where it got a photocopying service and to my surprise, they charged 50 cent per page. My words to that agency, go on enjoying yourself with those dirty money, u sucker!

My number was 1107, the current turn was for number 1100. After my number had been called, the girl at the counter asked me to take a seat again. Damn right, I waited until it was number 1175 turn, I waited for at least 1 hour and a half to get 2 pages of letter. 2 pages! I was sure that the second page didn't have to be typed because it was a test sheet (whether I am colour blind, can I see at least for 23m blah3). And the first time around, the name of the letter was spelled wrong! I gave a photocopy of IC and it was wrong! I mean, I can accept if it was because of my bad handwriting. So I have to wait for another 10 minutes for the letter to be corrected.

That part done, I have to go to Hospital Sultanah Aminah, JB. My father had a difficulty in remembering the right path, so we got lost a bit. Before we arrived at the hospital, we had a lunch first. Next, we went to the Poliklinik because that's where the eye clinic is. To get the parking at that visiting hour was almost impossible, after a few turns, I stepped out of the car and went to the Poliklinik myself. God, I hate waiting! I asked a nurse at the counter and she replied, all matters regarding driving licence must be bought forward to Pesakit Luar Department. Oh really? Wait until u read what happened to me next.

We went to the department. I went to Counter A, the lady said I have to go to Room 9. I went to Room 9, the nurse tested my right eye, the reverse 23m sight test. I aced the test, I told to go back to Counter A. I received my number and waited for the doctor in Room 1. Waiting...again! Just when my number was about to be called, the nurse from Room 1 told me to go to Counter A to get a new doctor. God, I was this close from breaking down. But I followed anyway. At Counter A, the lady gestured me to hand in something, what something? Can't she speak clearly and loudly? Just by gesture, how on earth would I know what she was asking for. Finally she said both the cards with a frown on her head. Was she menopausal or something? So I was instructed to go to Room 16 instead. Another waiting.

In the doctor's room, the doctor was so nice, she even objected that why should I have to do the same thing as over again since I already got a memo from Hosp Kota Tinggi Medical Officer. She was about to sign the conformation letter when her nurse stopped her, telling her that an eye specialist should do that part. Man, how I wished I could slap that nurse! So, I went out of the room with a reference letter instead. I was told to go back to Room 9 again before, u guess it! before I could go to the Poliklinik to see the eye specialist.

The same place all over again and it was already 3.30 pm. I registered at the Pesakit Luar Department at 2 pm. Now 'nice' of them, wasting my precious time. Sure they were having fun making me went round and round. At the eye clinic, I have to do the 23m test again, I got registered again and I had to wait again! My mother couldn't even walk anymore at this point, so she just waited in the car. In the doctors' room. Yes, doctors! There were two patients in the same room. I thought privacy is the absolute etiquette of medical practice but hey, I forgot, this is Malaysia!

So, I have to do the damned color blind test again. Huh! The doctor asked a few questions about my eye and tested, can my left eye saw any hint of light. Of course not. My lens, cornea, pupil were not there anymore! LOL! Then, she hesitated on how to fill out the JPJ letter. She waited until the other doctor was done with her patient to seek her opinion. Owh, an inexperienced doctor indeed. The other doctor was kinda 'bitchy' in my opinion, she innocently said that there's no way that I can drive. Oh, how empathetic! Finally, at the space where the doctor should write 'layak memandu/tidak layak memandu' they just left it black with P/S stating 'pesakit berkemungkinan tinggi menghadapi kesukaran melihat kenderaan dari arah kiri ketika memandu'. I could still remember the senior doctor said, 'kalau kite luluskan die drive, kite pulak yg kene, biar JPJ yg decide'. Gosh, at that time I feel like a disease, where everyone doesn't want to hold responsible for me.

I went out of the clinic with only 45 minutes to spare before JPJ would be closed. My father tried his best to make it in time but again, with the traffic jam, we headed home straight away. At home, my mother was struck with asthma attack because she had to climb the damned stairs to get to the JPJ office. Worse, she refused to go to the hospital. Whatever mom, I'm just so messed up right now.

Chance and Change

2010-12-12T20:24:00.000+08:00

Here's my problem:

I learn so well from mistakes until I become an induction's slave. So to say, once u blew my trust away, I can't simply forget it.

For example, if u happened to make me wait once, purely just because u slept, u forgot, or u're simply fashionably late (read = u don't give a dam* about time management), I learnt from that experience quickly, I'd consider it as MY mistake, 'oh, maybe I should go with someone else besides that person' because I know it's hard for people to change.

Maybe that explains why I do not have many close friends. *shrugs*

Here's what I think about myself as a third person:

I do think I'm someone who's easy on forgiveness. I usually forget people's old mistakes EXCEPT when a particular mistake was done by the same person all over again. It will automatically lights up my brain and makes me remember that 'this is not the 1st time she/he did this to me'. Very, very vividly.

Thus, if we take the previous example, 'she made me wait', and after a later explanation, it turned out that, that's not her fault, I had been hurt already. The damage was done. I keep telling myself that 'why should I be pissed, it's not her fault anyway', I can't simply erase the pain away.

Does this indicates that I didn't forgive her completely previously?

And then I blame myself, 'this wouldn't happen if I just push her away from my life'. So, I'll be pain-free from useless waiting, whether it was her fault or not.

And then, how many years more should I live without giving a chance for people to be close with me? Just for the sake of saving myself from the pain. I mean, no matter how hard I try, I keep on feeling hurt when I have to wait for her unnecessarily for whatever reasons. U see, the pain come first before the explanation, and the explanation fails to override the pain.

Maybe I am pessimistic and negative. I mean, I should expect people to change for better even if it's not always the case.

Enchanted

2010-12-08T20:52:00.000+08:00

I literally raped the replay button. You rite, I'm 21 years old grown up listening to Taylor Swift's song entitled Enchanted. Yeah. Whatever.

Another thing, the video has a slight pitch shift to avoid copyright issues.

Waiting

2010-12-08T20:23:00.000+08:00

I personally believe that Malaysians spend half of the lives waiting.

Waiting in queue in banks, government agencies, hospitals.

Waiting in the traffic jam.

Waiting for the buses that never follow the schedules.

Waiting to be served in the restaurants, waiting for the foods to be delivered.

I was thinking...how many people died while waiting for the doctors? How many women gave birth to a stillborn because they were stuck in the traffic jam on the way to the hospitals?

Man...I do love my country and I'm not just complaining. Of course I need to do something.

WE...need to do something~

I just feel that I spent too much time of my precious holiday by simply waiting...

And I hate waiting. =S

Till then

2010-11-23T13:49:00.000+08:00

Less than 24 hours left before I say goodbye to Adelaide...at least for this year.
I'll hang around in Melbourne for a couple of days before making my way to Malaysia.
I dreamed bout M'sia already this morning. Strangely, it wasn't a sweet dream nor a nightmare, just bad dream I supposed.
Anyway~ Left that aside.

Adelaide's temperature is super high right now. I thought I may die of dehydration when I went to the city just now. Can't resist the temptation of Southern Cross' combination yiros.

I chose to bring the biggest luggage bag I could find. I was positive I would only use like 1/2 of the space available, plus I already got my vacuum bags.

Hey~ I was dead wrong. The bag is almost full right now and I haven't even hit the mall in Melbourne yet. Urgh~

Sheesh...I miss my bear hugs so much that I could end up taking Prozac instead.

21

2010-11-14T13:05:00.000+08:00

Aaah, the magic number. Scary yet true. I'm officially 21 years old today. Funny how my brother and sister got married when they were at my age.

Thanks for all the wishes!! Really appreciate them.

"Allah is the one who created you from weakness, then made after weakness strength, then made after strength weakness and white hair. He creates what He wills, and He is the Knowing, the Competent." (30:54)

One year older brings us one year closer to well...being old and weak, or else we never had the chance to experience it because one year older also means that we are one year closer to death.

I know I'm not ready and I'm not proud of it. Note to self: do something about it.

Marine Ecology

2010-11-12T16:05:00.000+08:00

Dua hari lepas, dalam bas balik ke City setelah broke up dengan Chemistry, saya tanya Nina, "lepas ni exam ape?"

Dia jawab, "Organism" (Strictly bukan Orgasm) . "Tapi dah banyak baca. Hoho"

Saya macam wow gak, pastu saya tanya la macam mana boleh banyak dah baca.

"Sebab banyak bertindan dengan Human Perspective. Gram-positive, gram-negative, respiratory system etc"

Terlintas la perasaan sedikit terkilan bila dengar statement tu. Sebab saya pernah enrol untuk Organism tapi drop subjek tu the night before semester 2 officially start. Ermm..sebab x mahu practical byk2.

Balik tu saya bagitau la Sakinah, "mesti senang nak score kalau amik Organism"

Dia balas, "La, study bukan pasal nak score. Kalau tak amik Ecology, knowledge tu x berkembang la"

Fikir2 semula, sangat betul. Kalau x, x dapat la merasa pergi Field Trip walaupun hanya ke Adelaide Hills dan River Torrens, x dapat cerita kat housemates saya pasal crisis Blue Fin Tuna between Australia dan Japan dan x dapat belajar pasal Marine Ecology, the only part of the course yang saya betul2 enjoy belajar (saya cuba sedaya upaya untuk datang lectures part ni kerana input bukan kerana lecturer yang entah kenapa super hawt, maybe the outcome of scuba diving menjadikan otot2 badannya....ok, cukup wahai Zuleeza)

Lepas tu tadi jumpa ayat ni,

"Telah tampak kerosakan di darat dan di laut disebabkan kerana perbuatan manusia. Allah menghendaki agar mereka merasakan sebahagian dari (akibat) perbuatan mereka, agar mereka kembali (ke jalan yang benar)." 30:41

Selama ni saya tahu manusia memang bring harm to both land and ocean. While it is easy untuk listkan apa kerosakan yang manusia buat di darat, I find it hard to point out ape kerosakan yang manusia buat di laut. But not after learning about Marine Biology even just a little.

Syukur. If only manusia seluruhnya tahu kita perlu kembali. Well, that's part of our job to make it happens though.

p/s: Rasa macam Ben Bradshaw pulak bila cube berblog dalam Bahasa Melayu.

Smith's

2010-11-12T08:12:00.000+08:00

Is currently reading the massive Psychology textbook for tomorrow's exam, starving but getting nauseated with eating breads and cereals, staring at this packet of potato chips that I can't eat.

Yeah, I know it's my fault anyway for buying this chips before calling Smith's company about the ingredients. Cheese powder, oh dear cheese powder, why oh why didn't you be made with renate originating from some sort of plants or microbes?

Speak Now

2010-11-11T15:10:00.001+08:00

Ermm...did I make it so obvious that I'm currently in the state of chronic boredom by posting post after post on the same day I came back from my hiatus?

So, let it be.

Because I am also in the state of confusion for becoming a Swifty? I mean, how could it be possible for me to listen to songs by a pop country singer ~~with blond curls~~ who is apparently younger than me? Man, of course I adore her, she makes me think that we are living in a parallel universe with no wars, no hungers and no mycobacterium tuberculosis (I mean, really!). But this time, I actually listen to her. My favs: Enchanted, Dear John, Innocence, Haunted, Back To December and surprisingly Mine. Hmm...

Ermm...can't wait to get my hands on her album, I suppose. (What's wrong with me, anyway?)

The Past Vol III: Lullaby of A Guelder Rose

2010-11-11T14:48:00.000+08:00

Ok, I'm actually hiding something.
Well, besides visual arts, I used to write poems and short stories too. In Malay and English. (Now u're imagining I was a nerd when in school right? Nope. I'm too busy being a teachers' pet to become a nerd)
One of them is

Lullaby of A Guelder Rose

Close your eyes,
If you can't see straight at me,
Not right trough me,
Using me, please don't using me
Make me begging for my life, I'm your sacrifice

These tears of grief, even though I'm not crying,
I can't deny your calls
These scars of deceit, even though I'm not bleeding
I can't reply your calls
These dreams of disbelief, even though I'm not sleeping
I can't testify your calls
These wounds of defective, even though I'm not dying
I can't justify your calls

Cast away your spell again,
Can't get enough of this torment,
After the wind blew back then,
Breezing against the wilt of a guelder rose,
A symphony celebrating a surrendered soul.

Wanna puke?

Here's the pile

I mean, honestly it does sounds strange even to me now. But if u ask me to write something like that at this moment, then I can't. I simply can't. But the truth is I wrote at least 15 poems when I was...well...a teenager? Yup, this poem indeed sounds dark and depressing. In fact, most of stuff that I wrote are. Haha! Remember when I told u, I was way, way happier now than ever?

TV Show of the day:
Appocalypse: The Second World War at National Geographic channel
This is what a documentary should be. I watched 3 episodes of it so far and it left such an impact on me. I never thought that the artillery and weapons were so sophisticated (the one that awed me the most was Stalin's Pipe) It got me thinking, if, and just if ,any wars will break out in these modern times, I wonder how monstrous the weapons are.

No More Chemistry

2010-11-11T09:12:00.002+08:00

Well, somehow I'll be forced to learn Biochemistry or Medicinal Chemistry later in my course Insha Allah.

But...

...seriously, yesterday was the end of ermm...how should I put it...'Pure' Chemistry...

...the day I fall in love again with Organic Chemistry. I always love it, drawing isomers, naming the structures, memorizing the meth, eth, prop, but, pent of it but not this semester when I was presented with this horrifying roadmap.

Man...it isn't that hard once you do gazillion of exercises (I mean, gah-zil-lion!). Nothing beats the bliss of getting to the right structure at the very end of the journey (Oh, well. Maybe receiving a parcel bought from e-bay does beat the feeling).

Ok, listen. I seriously love chemistry even I seriously hate acids and bases, electrochemistry, stoichiometry and those dreadful quantum numbers and wave functions (purely because I suck at Math, big time!).

I can still remember the feeling of 'kid in the candy shop' when I sneaked into my secondary school's preparation lab, all the colours of ferum, nickel, copper solution, the feeling of joy to be able to share what I know with my fellow classmates when SPM was just 'di sekeliling bucu' (the teacher even let me use the lab and the green board after class. Thanks Pn. Normahanum!), the feeling when I got 7 for Chemistry in IB exam, the only high level subject I managed to score 7.

Dear Chemistry, you'll stay in heart always. =)

Again

2010-11-11T08:50:00.001+08:00

Salam and hi!

Maybe we can try this again?

Don't expect me to start off this post with "it's been a while since I last wrote blah blah blah.."

It has been a WHILE!

Hello once again from me =)

Size 10

2010-05-29T08:00:00.001+08:00

U have no idea how relieved I feel right now, coming back from Uni. I didn’t even have the appetite for breakfast this morn. I had a titration experiment (Lame I know, but considering how horrifying my math is, working with all those absolute errors, relative errors, significant figures surely will slowing my pace down. And I have to finish everything in 3 hours time!

So, it started off pretty awful. I broke a pipette!!! I left it lay down on my bench and I was rushing to weigh my tubes of water. Suddenly, I heard the sound of glass shattering. Funny enough, my first thought was, ‘Luckily it didn’t happen to me’ What the? And then a demonstrator nearby shouted out, “Whose pipette is this?” And people started looking at me. I’m like, ‘Oh dear, I’m doomed!’

So, I came back to my place and apologized. To my surprise, the demonstrator said ‘It’s okay, accident happens’ And so foolish of me, I just went back to the place where I supposed to be headed before this. I should clean those up!!! Hayya…

So when I came back to my bench, she was sitting on my chair and reminded me that I should clean up the mess myself and I apologized more. And still the same response, ‘It’s okay, accident happens’. I’m so ashamed, ok! T_T

About 5 minutes later, she asked me again, am I alright. I was like, whoa, I thought she’ll be like, ‘hey u clumsy, clueless girl, I wasn’t paid to clean up your mess’ *sigh* Tu la, laen kali jangan buruk sangka.

Nevertheless, I was embarrassed. Alhamdulillah, the rest of the experiment went pretty smoothly and in fact, I still got time to help Nicole, my lab partner to finish her lab report and she helped me too. This is the only experiment which we had to work alone.

Hmm...back to the title, I can proudly say that now I'm size 10!!! I finally gain weight here in Aussie. Blame the milk, the chocs, the cheese that are sold cheaply in here.

Mi Confesion

2010-05-23T12:39:00.002+08:00

Ok, ok. Yesterday, I was suddenly having 'that' time again, I cracked with no hint at all, causing panic to my fellow housemate. I was really happy and suddenly bam! It hit me. I don't know why I've gotten so vulnerable these days, the study isn't that hard (yet) like it used to be, I'm no longer starving to ensure I still have money by the end of the month, I no longer have to ask for anyone's permission to go shopping like there's no tomorrow.

But then again, I feel so lonely. I dream of traveling around the world while I'm still studying because I know once I start to work, things will not be as simple as it is right now. Going to Indo, Eire, UK, NZ, where I can meet my friends. Let alone traveling across the oceans, I am still trapped here in Adelaide, barely made it to Kangaroo Island. Money is of course the issue, but the biggest issue is me. M-E

I chose Adelaide because I don't want to stuck with people I know way back in college. Allah, forgive me because I had a slight remorse of coming here. I know my choice is nothing if You wouldn't permit it. In fact, I feel grateful because I was not allowed to study in NZ. He knows well how I hate coldness. It makes me crippled. Seriously. Thank You for shedding the light on me.

Back to the M-E issue, for the first few weeks here, I did feel enthralled to meet and greet new people. But as I would have predict it, once I've settled down and found my comfort zone again, I'll stop and I did. Yeah, my life is good. I have regular lab partners, Emma for Bio and Nicole for Chem, which is an excellent fact because they would be walking away from me by now if they found me unworthy. I sat with 'the group' in Stat class which consist of blonds and brunettes with brains and beauty. I have Thao as my best friend at Uni who is a selfless, hardworking, always-there-for-me kind of girl.

And yet, I'm living in an auto-pilot mode.

I no longer feel itchy to go to classes like I used to feel way back in KMB. (Believe it or not, I love KMB with all my heart)

I'm no longer looking forward for the next experiment which I will be doing like I used to think when see people with lab coats on.

I'm no longer laughing my a** off in class like I used to everytime I was in Malay A1 classes.

It has been a year and truthfully, I haven't move on.

My childhood is the darkest period of my life, and if I'm offered all the fortune in the world, I still never want to go through it again. I was able to recover as a teenager back then, and I thought I reach nirvana (so to say 'the happiest phase' of my life) during the upper form. And I was afraid to leave school, thinking I will not be able to feel the same way anymore.

Indeed, I didn't feel the same. I felt better. If those days were pure happiness, in KMB I found bliss, a feeling that I thought I never deserve to taste with a mountain of sins in my bills. I once thought that my heart can't contain this much love from Him but yeah, it stays intact till now =)

In short, my life closely follows the sigmoid curve where those moments can be regarded as the exponential phase. At this very moment, it seems like the plateau phase. Not much adrenaline and serotonin going on, just a bucket fulls of acetylcholine. It is good to navigate away from the extremes of euphoria and stress, but it feels too normal. Hmm...

Nevertheless, I am grateful to see the colours of autumn these days, thinking how far have I go.

Too bad, I felt so alone yesterday... I want to travel and catching up with friends but my current friends want to catch up their own friends.. Have I to go alone, I'm not use to traveling by myself yet. I can even got lose in a building, let alone another state, I just gotten my passport last year, have ridden the airplanes only thrice, Senai-KLIA-Adelaide. How would I trust myself to embark a journey alone?

I want to come back home; I no longer have a home to come back to. So much has change since the last Raya. But then, I no longer obliged to hang a perfect family portrait on my wall and fake a smile. Therefore, I am relieved. It's not a mystery, why lie and life are spelt very similar, you know.

But thanks again dear Lord for shedding more light (or photons?) on me. Uni may not be as exciting as I expect it would be (and of course I never try hard enough to make it more exciting) but coming home is definitely a thrill for me.

Quite the contrary right? I used to like college and terrified of the sight of my matchbox room (I do love my roommate tough ^^). Right here, I feel so-so about Uni but I can't wait to get home, experimenting in the kitchen, dining with my housemates, sleeping peacefully without having nightmares anymore. Thanks to them too for resisting the temptation to call the mental institution to come and pick me up until now. (Ok, I'm exaggerating. I may have a bathtub now but I don't have a hairdryer to electrocute myself. Duh!)

Is He generous or what? ^______________^

Novel of the day:

Despite having exams come crashing onto me like a runway train next month, I was just finished reading an old (but definitely not ancient) novel by the Dublin's sweetheart, Cecelia Ahern entitled Where Rainbows End. Am-muh-zing! Ok, actually not quite. The plot is predictable, the storyline is extremely done-done, I'm not getting a reality bite such when novels like To Kill a Mockingbird or A Thousand Spendid Suns would've done to me, but this novel is definitely worth reading. It's not easy to make me laugh, u know.

Women's Aurat: What Has Happened

2010-05-08T19:05:00.000+08:00

If you happened to read my post entitled 'A New Me, Well Not So Fast This Time Around' I've stated that I wanna share an article from Ustaz Zaharuddin's blog, Women Aurat: What Has Happened. So, after almost 5 months, I wanna keep my words. It's kinda hard at the beginning because the simple rule is, once you've proposed to others to do this to do that, first thing first is to do what u've proposed beforehand. Otherwise, you'll be like 'cakap tak serupa bikin' or in loghat jawanya 'hypocrite'.

But until when? I mean, I know I am far from perfect in this 'aurat' matter and I am trying my best to improve myself, slow and steady. *very cliche indeed* But yeah, I think my readers are smart enough not being judgmental and keep supporting each other from deviating from the 'siratul mustakim'. So, enjoice ^^

One day I was giving a talk to a group of professional Muslimah. The topic of a Muslim lady held in custody for dressing indecently in a nightclub was a hot issue back then. Consequently, there was a discussion on woman's right to wear any attire she likes, including indecent outfits. During the talk, I therefore took the chance to ask a few simple questions to the audience:

"Why would a woman wear indecent attire in public? For example short skirts with tight or see-through dresses?"

Some of them started to share their opinions. Nevertheless, as too many were talking at the same time; I could not hear any clear responds. I therefore asked for a representative to share her opinion. A lady stood up and answered confidently:

"To look beautiful of course..." She responded with a bashful smile.

"Perhaps to whom is this beauty being addressed?" I probed further.

"Of course to the males ustaz, and maybe to other women too...." She continued.

"In that case, if a man is attracted to the beauty and would like to touch the "beautiful" parts he saw, would that be allowed then?" I asked to test.

"Certainly not...That is considered as a sexual harassment ustaz" she replied with poise.

"I see. Then, don't women feel that wearing indecent attires and displaying their beauty is also a form of sexual harrasment to the males?" I contested.

"Erm...how would that be the case ustaz?" They asked with a puzzle.

"Just imagine, when a man looks at a woman displaying her thigh for example, he may be sexually aroused. If he could not channel his sexual desires, isn't that a form of harrasment to him? That's why I say, a woman wearing indecent attires in public is a sexual harrasment to the surrounding males...."

The crowd was silent, analyzing what I had just said.

"Just like a hungry cat being lured with fresh fish in front of it. If you don't give the cat the fish, it will be annoyed and may even attack the person enticing it," I added.

"Nonetheless, one has to bear in mind that not all cats will act like described above; only those starving wild cats will. The same goes with males; not all males fail to control their sexual desire when looking at indecently dressed women although there are still many out there who fail to do so." I continued.

"The indecently dressed woman may not be harrased because she was in public and the surrounding does not allow for him to fulfill his desires. Consequently, this wild cat would find other victims to channel his desires. Small innocent children may become his target. In this state of mind, a woman properly covered, a small child or an old lady would not make much difference to the starving wild cat. As long as the timing and the place are right, he will try to get what he has desired for with force." I explained in detail. The audience was nodding, agreeing with me.

In fact, let us think together; do women truly believe that if they are in the presence of the Prophet SAW today, he would be smiling? If not, what is the possibility for them to obtain the syafa'at of the Prophet on the Day of Judgment? It is very true that an indecently dressed woman, due to her appealing appearance, may get man's attention. This pleasure, however, is only temporal and fake. In fact, it would not, in any event, add to any value to the eternal life we will traverse after death, except for a more severe punishment. In reality, the way the righteous Arab women who cover themselves properly today may perhaps serve as an indication to the type of attires being worn by Muslimah during the time of the Prophet, which was, without a doubt, pleasing to the Prophet SAW. Don't women nowadays, love to please the Prophet as well?

IS IT TRUE THAT COVERING AURAT CAN PROTECT A WOMAN FROM BEING HARMED?

A lot of professional Muslim women today and those with insufficient Islamic knowledge do not like to discuss about this topic and they don't even believe that covering aurat could prevent harm from inflicting them. Some is even of the opinion that covering the aurat is a form of oppression that the males have enforced on woman. I have always come across with this argument presented in the mass media.

In reality, as a servant of Allah SWT and the follower of Rasulullah SAW, we are taught to always come back to Al-Quran and Al-Hadith to obtain assurance about the permissibility of a matter. Regarding this, Allah SWT said:-

يَا أَيُّهَا النَّبِيُّ قُل لِّأَزْوَاجِكَ وَبَنَاتِكَ وَنِسَاء الْمُؤْمِنِينَ يُدْنِينَ عَلَيْهِنَّ مِن جَلَابِيبِهِنَّ ذَلِكَ أَدْنَى أَن يُعْرَفْنَ فَلَا يُؤْذَيْنَ وَكَانَ اللَّهُ غَفُورًا رَّحِيمًا

"O Prophet! Tell your wives and your daughters and the women of the believers to draw their cloaks (veils) all over their bodies. That will be better, that they should be known (as free respectable women) so as not to be molested. "(Al-Ahzab: 59)

Jilbab is a dress (of similar width to ‘baju kurung') worn by women to cover their bodies. Syeikh Dr Yusof Al-Qaradawi explained that when some women during the Jahiliah period left their houses, they loved to display some parts of their beauty such as the chest, neck and hair until they were being harrased by those wicked men who like to commit zina. Then, the above ayat was revealed commanding the Muslim women to extend their jilbab so that the parts that could lead to fitnah will be covered. In this way, they would be identified as women who are protected (‘afifah). As a consequence, they would not be molested.

Therefore, the main reason (‘illah) for the above ruling is to prevent Muslim women from being molested by wicked men. Attires that display women's beauty or women walking and talking in a seducing manner could arouse a man's sexual desire. Such behavior is an indirect invitation to the male for teasing and molestation. (Adapted from kitab Al-Halal wal Haram fil Islam with modification)

WOMEN'S OBJECTION

"Well, nowadays even women who wears veil is raped and even worse they are sometimes strangled to death using their veil. Furthermore, even children is raped and killed. This means, veil or hijab is no longer relevant as a protection to women ustaz. What do you say?"

The above point is the common objection of women today when the topic of aurat is discussed.

"Have you ever felt angry in your life?" I asked to counter argue.

"Of course...but what is the connection ustaz?" They asked back looking very confused.

"Usually when someone is very angry, would they be able to evaluate the consequences of their action? For example, when someone is annoyed by the cry of a baby, they may even kick the small baby, push the child down the stairs or stuff the child's face with a pillow to stop the annoying noise. After a few seconds, the person may be conscious of what he or she was doing and regret their action."

"The same applies to bad desires. When a person is controlled by their wicked desires, he would not look at the attire or the age of his victim. As long as his desires are fulfilled, any victim would do. That's why even women that cover their aurat properly, a child, an old lady or someone's wife could fall victim of a rapist. Prono magazine, VCD, websites and novels of course has contributed its role to increasing rape crime lately." I explained at length.

"Then, why did Al-Quran say that wearing hijab could prevent women from being molested?" They asked full of curiosity this time.

"If we observe the above ayat, it was prescribed to all women. Thus, if most women does not abide by the ruling and wears indecent attire, then the hijab could no longer prevent molestation. Indirectly, the ayat is explaning that women as a whole is responsible towards the safety of other women by properly observing the requirements to cover their aurat." I explained.

If a woman is planning to wear indecent attire, she should bear in mind that she may be jeopardizing the safety of another woman because she has activated the sexual arousement of a male.

CAR POOL TO MASJID

One day I car-pooled with office colleagues to the masjid in Kuala Lumpur to perform Friday prayers. When we arrived at a traffic light near the Golden Triangle, suddenly a few friends in the car was very excited and was wistling and teasing... "Uii....look at that....peh....that's tempting..."

Then a friend reminded them:

"Astaghfirullah...what are you guys doing....ustaz is here with us." They concurred and said "Sorry we forgot...that's why it's good to bring ustaz along...at least he could remind us."

You can guess what they saw right? Alhamdulillah I did not see anything because I was busy going through various questions that flooded my cellphone. When I asked what happened, they shyly admitted that they were looking at KL women, Chinese and Malays alike, with their mini skirts at the Golden Triangle.

Just imagine how these guys must have felt. They were on their way to the masjid, however they were still aroused looking at indecent women along the way. Are these guys wicked?

"Eee these men are just despicable. How can they be so such a chauvinists? Hopely our husbands are not like this." Maybe most women would be thinking like this after reading the above scenario.

However, be aware ladies that this is the biggest challenge for the males' out there. Women, that's YOU, with all the beauty that Allah SWT has granted, is a test for the men, as prescribed in Al-Quran:

زُيِّنَ لِلنَّاسِ حُبُّ الشَّهَوَاتِ مِنَ النِّسَاء وَالْبَنِينَ وَالْقَنَاطِيرِ الْمُقَنطَرَةِ مِنَ الذَّهَبِ وَالْفِضَّةِ

ALLURING unto man is the enjoyment of worldly desires through women, and children, and heaped-up treasures of gold and silver

This ayat clearly says that men's main desire is towards women. The Prophet SAW also said:

ما تركت فتنة أضر على الرجال من النساء

"I did not leave a fitnah after me that could bring more harm to a man except woman" (Narrated by Al-Bukhari, 7/11, Chapter Zikir & Doa)

MOCKING AN ISLAMIC RULING?

I still remember, at my former office, some of my colleagues if they accidently looked at indecent women, they would always say, "The first look is not sinful right ustaz?" It's sad to ponder upon the condition of Muslims today. Due to ignorance, they do not feel guilty to mock Islamic rulings regarding important matters such as looking at the aurat of a non-mahram.

A hadith: "From Jarir bin Abdullah, he said: I asked Rasulullah s.a. w. about looking at (women's aurat) accidently. Rasullullah said: Withdraw your look!" (Narrated by Ahmad, Muslim, Abu Daud and Tarmizi) - which means, Do not look at it once again according the Prophet's hadith to Sayyidina Ali r.a.

No one should mock any Islamic ruling or anything relevant to the ruling. The Prophet SAW said:-

ان العبد ليتكلم بالكلمة ما يتبين فيها يزلّ بها إلى النار أبعد مما بين المشرق والمغرب

"Verily a servant that says something without realizing the ruling or impact of his saying, then his words may cause him to be tossed in hell as deep as the distance between east and west." (Narrated by Al-Bukhari, Chapter Hifdz al-Lisan, 11/256, no 2988)

PURPOSE OF COVERING AURAT

The evidence from Al-Quran and al-Hadith clearly indicates that the issue of covering aurat is primary (qati'e and usul). In addition it is also one of the main sins advocated by Shaitan because exposing the aurat could lead to various other sins; zina (illegal sexual intercourse), pregnancy due to zina, killing of child from zina, divorce due to adultery and many more. Al-Qur'an renders evidence that Shaitan advocates exposure of aurat as its main strive:

"Then Shaitan whispered suggestions to them both in order to uncover that which was hidden from them of their private parts..." (Al-A'raf: 20)

In summary, among the main purpose Islam advocates the covering of aurat for both man and woman are as folowing:-

a) To differentiate between man and beast.

Allah SWT said in Al-Qur'an:

"O children of Adam! We have bestowed raiment upon you to cover yourselves and as an adornment." (Al-A'raf: 26)

It is clear from the above ayat that covering of aurat is ordained to every human being (children of Adam). Those who refrain from the order has clearly outcast himself from the category of children of Adam and descend into the category of beast that does not have the ability to follow Allah's enjoinment to cover aurat.

b) To protect woman from being molested

This is clear as per my explanation above according to Surah Al-Ahzab ayat 59.

c) As an attire or identification for Muslim.

In Surah Azhab ayat 59 Allah SWT said: « ... That will be better, that they should be known (as free respectable women)...»

The above ayat elucidates that covering the aurat is an emblem of a Muslim. Allah SWT also said:

وَمَن يُعَظِّمْ شَعَائِرَ اللَّهِ فَإِنَّهَا مِن تَقْوَى الْقُلُوبِ

"And anyone who honours the symbols set up by God [shall know that] verily, these [symbols derive their value] from the God-consciousness in the [believers'] hearts " ( Al-Haj : 32 )

d) Sign of profesionalism.

We could observe today that a number of organizations and restaurants prescribe certain dress code to its employee and guests to ensure high standards of professionalism. For example, it would impossible to find someone wearing slippers in an international convensyen at PICC, Putrajaya. Nor could we come across employees of PETRONAS wearing slippers at their office in the twin towers. All of them need to comply with the dress code ordained by their organization to show professionalism. Compare this with the owner of a grocery store that does not need to maintain any professionalism and could wear any attire he wants.

Islam as a professional way of live is also complete with its guidelines that cover every aspect of life; from private acts (going to the toilet) to administration of the country and economy. Nonetheless, Islam would not prescribe guidelines that are irrational and cause hardship to its followers. Therefore, the dress code in Islam would by no means cause nuisance to Muslims. Conversely it provides professionalism to those who embrace the guideline.

e) As a trial from Allah SWT to test the takwa of Muslims.

This is clear as Allah elucidates in Al-Quran that: "...Who has created death and life that He may test you which of you is best in deed." (Al-Mulk: 2)

DON'T JUDGE A BOOK BY ITS COVER

I always come across with this expression and I believe you are the same. The following are the words of those women who do not cover their aurat who always claim to posess pure and kind hearts although they are wearing indecent outfits which reveal their aurat.

"Even women who put on hijaab commit crime nowadays, indulging in adultery, free-mixing and a lot more" A woman share her thought.

"In fact, we too are well-behaved, we do not bother others, we do not backbite and we stay away from bad things" The woman added.

Is it a sound argument? Is it true that the external appearance does not matter in Islam? Some of them are even one step ahead in their arguments that they reason with the meaning of an authentic hadith of the Prophet, which is:

"Verily Allah does not look at your physical being, your outer appearance nor your wealth, but He looks at your heart and your deeds" (Narrated by Muslim).

I feel sorry and dishearten looking at those who when arguing, easily throw out hadith in supporting their whims; indeed, they only utilize Islam in the matter that bring benefits to them.

An employee was caught playing game during working hours by his employer while he has yet to prepare the document requested by him. The employer thus said, "How are you going to excel in your carreer if this is your attitude towards work."

The employee responded, "You may see me outwardly as playing games but my heart is sincere and I performed my duty excellently."

Do you think that the employer believe in what his employee had said? Does Allah consider one's heart as pure and good through disobeying His commandments?

Indeed, something is only regarded as pure and good by measuring it with the scale of Allah and His Rasul, and not merely with the scale of our minds. If we refer to the scale of Islam, the Prophet SAW had said which means:

"Beware, in the body there is a piece of flesh; if it is sound, the whole body is sound and if it is corrupt the whole body is corrupt, and hearken it is the heart" (Narrated by Muslim)

Based on this hadith, Islamic scale necessitates that the purity of one's heart is apparent in its first stage, which is one's actions. It means that when one's actions always transgress against the commandments prescribed in Islam, it signifies the filth of one's heart. On the other hand, if the external actions submit to the commandment of Islam, thus it should be considered as good in the first stage, which is the external scale of lay people. Nevertheless, the second stage, which is whether one's intention is for seeking Allah's pleasure or for things such as showing off, we should leave the judgment only to Allah.

Therefore, we can judge a book by its cover in certain cases, such as in the case when the fundamentals of Islam are being transgressed; the cover is consequently reflecting what is inside the heart of a person.

Judging based on that which is apparent, does go along with the hadith:

إنما أنا بشر , وإنكم تختصمون إلىّ , ولعلّ بعضكم أن يكون ألحن بحجته من بعض , فأقضي بنحو ما أسمع , فمن قضيت له من حق أخيه شيئاَ فلا يأخذه , فإنما أقطع له قطعة من النار

Which means: "Verily I am only a human being, and you always presented arguments for me to solve. It may be that some of you are better in presenting argument than others. Therefore, I give out rulings based on what I have heard only. He, for whom I have made a ruling that violates the rights of the other party (due to the lack of skill of the person in presenting argument), does not take it. For verily, it will be for him a slice from the slices of hellfire" (Narrated by Abu Dawood, At-Tirmidzi and others; Refer Naylul Awtar, 8/632, no 3920).

This hadith clearly shows that a judge in Islam will give a ruling based on the information and the evident proofs presented to him. Similarly, in the case of covering aurat, if one reveals the aurat, it is a sign of transgression against Allah's commands. Thus, how would it be possible for this kind of heart to be perceived as a sound heart in Islam?

Women should realize that when the aurat is not covered properly, every single man who looks at it will be held accountable for every single gaze. The woman, on the other hand, is not going to be held accountable for that one sin merely; rather she will be held accountable for all the gazes from men that fell on her aurat. Just imagine how sinful she is for revealing the aurat only in one day. This is based on the Prophet's word:

من سن في الإسلام سنة سيئة فعليه وزرها ووزر من عمل بها من غير أن ينقص شيئاً

Which means: "Whosoever initiates a wrongdoing, upon him are a sin and the sin of every single person who does it without his sin being reduced even a little..." (Narrated by Ahmad and others-Authentic)

Included in the meaning of intiating is that someone intiates the revealing of her aurat in that day causing the man who looks at her to be held accountable. In fact, the woman herself is sinful for every single eye that sets on her aurat. Would this type of heart be considered as pure? After mountains of sins had rusted it?

Verily Allah is All Just and the Most Merciful. Rush towards Allah's love and mercy by obeying Him. For those who are hardhearted, no words can be shared except; be certain that Allah is true, His Rasul is true, and Paradise and Hellfire are true. If believe in them, why are the actions speak otherwise?

Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia

http://www.zaharuddin.net/

12 June 2007

Last update: 12-06-2007 17:32

Menebas Semak & Membuang Sawang

2010-05-07T07:49:00.002+08:00

Tetibe rase nak berblog dalam bahase Melayu.

Haish...da semak da blog ni. Nak kate busy memang la, tapi budak yg amek medic buleh je berblog selalu. Ngengade ar Zuleeza nih..

In fact, sepatutnye sekarang aku sedang buat pre-reading chemistry. Dah la tajuk cipan, Hess Law yang pernah buat aku phobia tgk arrow. Tau ar pernah belajar, doesn't mean aku x perlu buat pre-reading. (Tyme belajar dulu pon, markah cipan gak bile buat topical test)

Rumah ni pulak da macam kene langgar garuda. Budak2 account x tido satu mlm sebab buat assignment. Yang budak medic tu pulak...err..cume menghargai mase free yang die ade utk tido. *tersenyum simpul* Well, bukan selalu die buleh guring melandau.

Nak buat sarapan, aku xde la lapo benar. Aneh.

Aku sebenarnye diawang-awangan nih. Euphoria ke? X kot. Selain drpd sukses dlm practical chem semalam, MCQ quiz bio yg aku buat malam tadi x hebat mane pon. Lega barangkali. Da abes wat application essay! *Yay* (Sungguhpun qualitynye agak pathetic)

Ok, ape point aku sebenarnye.

Baru aku pasan. Generally, there's nothing wrong with my life right now.

1. Aku dpt study kat bumi Adelaide yg ala2 Banting tp xde org Jawa. (Kalau ade pon cket la) Barang pon buleh dikatekan murah.

2. Aku x pernah terpikir dpt dgr lagi bunyi2 alam tyme pepagi after aku graduate dr KMB. Rupe2nye bunyi cengkerik & burung sangat meriah, bersahut-sahutan dgn bunyi hanjing.

3. Rumah aku dekat dgn Arndale dowh. Pastu kat Arndale ade satu kedai baju yg sangat 'aku' tapi dijual pade hrga yg murah thp cipan.

4. Aku da buleh e-baying. Ngahaha! Aku beli buku Stat berharga 6 dollar termasuk post. Bile aku dapat, harga pos die je 8.99 pounds. Gile hape org yg jual tu?

5. Housmet aku sume pandai masak. Pandai masak selain drpd bende yg aku pandai masak. Tu key pointnye. So, dpt makan variety of foods yg obviously sedap.

6. Aku amek Biomed instead of Biotech. Aku check Biotech punye Sem 1 subjects mlm tadi. Cam hape! Selaen Bio & Chem yg aku pon kene amek, diorg kene hambek Intro to Biotech, & Bio-processing. Hapekah? Gile menjurus.

7. Lagi dua subjects yg aku hambek ialah Stat & Psychology. Sungguhpun assignment Psych cam dasat tapi honestly seronok je belajar psl Psych. (Ye, aku ponteng lecture lagi pagi ni)

8. Aku strongly believe yg aku better study Psych sendiri instead of dtg lecture & silently cursing the lecturer sbb lecture yg maha bosan dan slow thp siput.

9. Stat? Mencabar gak sebenarnye. (Adus, baru teringat aku ade Stat Prac pg ni. Byk gile bende aku ponteng!) Rindu Cikgu Badar....T_T

10. Demonstrator Chem Prac aku gile ~~hot~~ helpful. The current Chem lecturer pulak sgt enthusiastic. Hari tu die bwk liquid nitrogen g lecture hall. Siyes cool gile. God knows ape die nak buat utk lecture hari ni.

One word: Alhamdulillah (techincally two words) Hey, aku x memaen la. Aku siyesly grateful dgn idup aku skrg. Dah, g maen jaoh2!

Till then...have a nice weekend peeps!

Oh ye...lupe nak bgtau. Tadi aku ~~stalk~~ blogwalking blog budak2 KMB yg sedang exam IB. Hohohohohoh... Cam x caye, aku pernah lalui saat2 genting, runcing & rase nak terkencing tu.

1st Month Anniversary

2010-03-17T19:22:00.000+08:00

Aaaah….finally! Seriously, I wanna blog even before I went to Aussie. =(

Officially a month now…hmm…the 1st week was a blast, I mean, u’re excited to meet new people, visiting new places and experiencing new things. The seniors who take us in temporarily were so helpful, the peer mentors are friendly and…hot? Hehe…the course advisor was amazingly warm and kind, I don’t think I’m able to enroll myself in, the senior citizen in the bus were kind. In short, I hardly found anything bad bout Adelaide on the 1st week. What I like here are:

1. People walk really fast. I can still remember how frustrating I would be when walking behind most of guys in KMB, they walk at snail pace. What the…

2. The toilets are clean. Except than u hafta bring a bottle of water urself and err…basically I don’t really like tandas duduk to be honest.

3. I can wear fancy clothes like maxi and denim dress and still look casual.

4. I can wear sunnies and not feeling like a celeb.

5. There are zebra crossing with sensor and timer, so I feel safe everytime I cross the road although well, I can’t see well.

6. The maximum wait for a bus is 15 minutes and the public transport system is darn organized…until it made me dizzy at first.

7. Arndale shopping centre is just 10 minutes away from my house. Plus, well…Rundle Mall is 5 minutes away from uni.

8. I bought a pair of Paris Hilton footwear’s boots at AUSD30 whereby the original price is AUS299 at Harbour Town.

9. Harbour Town made me nauseatic because all those branded stuff are sold at slashed price. Luckily, it was 1 hr away from my house, if not, then I’m gonna go there everyday? Kot.

10. I hafta walk 10 minutes from the bus stop to uni but I like what I saw along the way, Parliament House, State Library, Museum, Art Gallery and all those majestic Mitchell, Bonython, Elder Hall.

11. The tempat sidai kain in my house can rotate by itself, so I just hafta stand at one spot during jemur and angkat kain.

12. I finally have the chance to use quilt! (which cost me 59 bucks!) But we really dun have other option except to buy a good one or else u gonna die because of the cold during winter.

13. We have a fully automatic washing machine & BIG anti frost fridge. While those sound luxurious, they are the like, the most cikai fridge & washing machine we could find in that second hand shop.

14. Remember when I tell ya, I dun have any sense of direction? I think that part of brain is damaged since I was in my mom’s belly together with the deformity of my eye. So….I get myself an iPhone 3GS! For free meh! 49 cap plan with 3 mobile. Seriously, it’s a necessity NOT a fancy gadget for me.

15. I learnt Biology IB! Like, I am grateful to the max I did IB last time because Year 12 OZ didn’t cover those knowledge bout phosphodiester bond, nitrogenous bases ring structure and etc.

That’s all for now. Hehe…many assignments to be done.

Race Against The Time

2010-02-08T21:03:00.000+08:00

Approximately 1 week more to go...

My nafsu makan is like...

*sigh*

...scary meh...

Truthfully, I miss blogging so much..huhu...so many things I wanna write about, so little time >.<

So, that short hiatus may turn out to be a long hiatus indeed

Until then.

Alien Cows Anyone?

2010-02-01T22:40:00.001+08:00

Actually, I will be on hiatus from tomorrow until Thursday, so I like to leave my blog on happy note after several severe entries.

Go to: http://thesurrealist.co.uk/slogan.cgi
Put your name in, and generate slogan after each question.

1. What do you say to yourself every morning?
All Zuleeza, All The Time

–Nah! Time flies by at lightning speed right now. I can barely breathe. Literally. (Asthma attack)-

2. What do you want other people to say about you?
If u really want to know, look in the zuleeza

–Yup2, ppl hardly know me if they’re not close enuff to me-

3. Someone asked you out, your answer is...
easy, breezy, beautiful zuleeza

–Isn’t it taken from Covergirl ad? Like I didn’t know, duh!-

4. How would you answer a booty call?
good zuleeza has Danish Written All Over It

–ermm…sounds intimidating and err...wrong?-

5. How would you introduce yourself to someone you really like?
Ho ho ho, Green Zuleeza

–Hahahaha…I’m maybe a naturalist, but green? *suddenly remembering my alien cows in Farmville*-

6. To someone you dislike?
Cluck Click, Every Zuleeza

–Huh? Oh, maybe the person I dislike see my face everytime she/he click the remote? I’m all over the channels….or billboard. Ngahaha!-

7. You're in a conversation and you suddenly feel the need to pee, how would you excuse yourself?
The Best Zuleeza a Man Can Get

–The best one is the one who need to pee in the middle of conversation?-

8. Your parents ask you why you got home late, you say...
Wear Zuleeza

–LOL! simply not related-

9. You're failing a subject, you say...
There’s no Wrong Way To Eat A Zuleeza

–What? My punishment for falling a subject is to be eaten?-

10. The love of your life asks you to marry him/her, what do you say?
Don’t Live A Little, Live A Zuleeza

–Whoa…somehow it sounds romantic *slapping myself*-

11. Your bf/gf is breaking up with you, you tell him/her...
Zuleeza Stays Sharp ’til the bottom of the glass

–Uuuuuuuuuu…maybe I just don’t wanna let him go-

12. Someone told you you're an asshole, you tell them...
The Biggest Zuleeza Pennies Can Buy

–Haha..it’ll scared him or her away for sure-

13. What are the best words to describe you?
Tough on dirt, Gentle on Zuleeza

–Hikhik. Yeah everyone should be tough on dirt but be gentle on me. ^^-

14. If you're going to have a movie about your life, the title is...
Because I’m Worth Zuleeza

–Woot2! Box-office guaranteed-

15. Your last words before you die...
It’s Zuleeza Time

–See? Again it does sound right-

16. Your message to a special someone..
If u’ve got the time, we’ve got the zuleeza

–Hmm..sounds like I’m asking him for a date. LOL!-

**QWERTY**